Truce

Twenty Eight // Call It Off

"What happened?" It was Ada who asked, her hand on mine in the comforting way she did when she knew I was upset.

I gave her a brief look to say I'd explain later and turned to Hayden, who was already retrieving his bag from his locker.

"Leaving?"

I nodded.

"Mmkay," he said. Ada hugged me and then him, bidding us farewell as we headed to my car. It was still in the parking lot and in we hopped, speeding off to a place I was yet to decide.

We drove through thick green forests and past little freshwater streams and empty meadows behind wire fences until the ocean came into view, with its great expanse of water stretching for too far to see. I pulled onto the gravel turnoff and parked the car, turning it off but stayed where I was.

The beach stretched for miles, empty bar a mother and her young son playing on the sand. They were building sandcastles and seeming to enjoy the serenity that followed. Maybe if I got out and built a sandcastle I would feel less like my heart was being torn to shreds.

"Kaia doesn't need me anymore." It came out like air from a deflating balloon; fast and uneasy. "Both of our exes seem to have gotten the picture, whatever her situation is will be resolved after Wednesday and Vati is flying back for the weekend to tell us his decision. We're 'breaking up' on Monday."

The waves crashed outside the car and Hayden's face remained impassive. "I don't understand," he admitted, scratching the back of his neck. "What's wrong with that?"

"She's going to stop talking to me."

"She's not."

"She is. You weren't there this morning."

"I'm telling you, Jacob, she's no-"

"I love her, Hayden." I pushed my hair back. I took a deep breath. My chest rose and fell. "I can't lose her."

"Why don't you tell her that?"

"And scare her away more?"

His sigh sounded through the silent car. He put a hand to his face as he let out a groan as if to say fuck it, and let it out.

"I promised Parker on Sunday that I wouldn't tell you but you need to know."

"I need to know what?" I asked.

"Kaia likes you too, Jacob." For the second time today, my heart stopped. "She told you on Saturday, or she must have when you two got back from knick knocking. Both of you could hardly stand but she walked in with the biggest smile I've ever seen on her face – and I've been here for the last six years to know – and practically sang 'Jacob loves me!' You were all over each other, to the point where I felt I was intruding on something that should have been private. I swear, she likes you a hell of a lot."

"No...." I didn't want to believe it. If I did, it meant that I had confessed my love for her drunk, made a fool of myself, and everyone knew it. Everyone except Kaia.

"I almost wish I was kidding," he said. "But I'm not. Everyone says you're perfect together, myself and your sister included. And we know you both pretty well. Just... Don't let your pride get in the way of telling her how you feel or, you might just lose her."

I sat in the moderately expensive, almost comfortable drivers seat and thought, thought about how I didn't want Kaia to disappear from my life. Thought about every moment we'd spent together since we were kids, from meeting her that first day in primary school with her hair in two cute braids to this morning where she'd threatened to extinguish my main source of joy. Thought about how I'd always loved her, even when I didn't know it, even when I was too stubborn to admit it. I thought about what Hayden had said, about Sunday and that she liked me too and that maybe, it was possible that whatever we were wouldn't end on the day I was coming to dread; March fifth. Maybe we could survive it.