@sereace Because you refuse to watch the video I sent. I know you get nervous every time I update but I promise you this will be a positive one. Here's my belated Christmas gift for you.
And a peace offering to all of you who wanted to murder me because of the last update. This is unedited because I am dead tired.
Obviously, I do not own the people implied in this story, even the song I used or the quote mentioned here.
Inspired by my previous OTP. You will forever be in my heart.
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In Which It's Not Last Year Anymore
Once bitten and twice shy
I keep my distance but you still catch my eye
I knew it was such a d-bag move but I just don't think I can afford to get my heart broken again. Not after nursing it back to decent health for a long time. She's a nice girl, I know. Pretty -- no scratch that -- beautiful, really. The unconventional type, that which will not become an eyesore a few times after you've first seen her. She's spunky and sweet. There's just a certain vibe to her that I can't shake off. Like, it stays with me even after the 45 minutes that I've seen her on screen for six days a week. It's just there, it has never left. It draws me in, draws a buried part of me out. A part I didn't know existed until I saw her. Or that she saw me.
Still, I have resolved it upon myself to avoid showbiz [romantic] associations as much as possible. So even if most of the time I forget about this vow when we're live on TV, I still go back to it after. And I know it's affecting her. I see caution in her eyes, and when I look in the mirror, I see it on mine too. Now, while I'm trying to hold on to the walls I've built up, she's putting hers up too.
A crowded room,
Friends with tired eyes.
I'm hiding from you
And your soul of ice.
My god I thought you were someone to rely on.
Me? I guess I was a shoulder to cry on.
A face on a lover with a fire in his heart
A man undercover but you tore me apart
It is indeed a small world. And this world I'm living in makes it even smaller. It's not easy to avoid the one who caused me much heartbreak when we practically share the same space. Awkward silences, walking on eggshells, being civil and smiling for the cameras. I know we talked about remaining friends, but you can never really remain friends after that right? Not when I was treated pretty much like garbage and dumped, literally. But if there's one thing that grief taught me at an early age, it is that though it may never leave and that it may never really be the same again, the best thing to do is move forward. Because the world will not stop spinning just because you got brokenhearted or that your dreams are nowhere in sight. As it has been said before, whether it's a heartbreak or a heart attack, the show must go on.*
"I hope you can still forgive me? We can still recover what we used to be."
"I don't think that what we used to be is something that's recoverable."
"Then let's start over. You and me."
This year, to save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special
And in show business, it goes on and on and on.
It has went on for me, which meant crossing paths with her (even while trying my very best to avoid you). Now here is a crossroad I face. It is no longer a choice on whether or not to avoid you and forget, because that's a choice I have already made, or that has been made for me by circumstances. It is whether to continue on within these walls or allow myself to climb up and over mine and shatter hers to pieces next.
Here I find myself with a ladder of hope and a wrecking ball of determination.
"It's not last year anymore. I have already started over."
Now I've found a real love, you'll never fool me again.
"This is the best Christmas I've had in a long time."
"Really? Isn't Christmas supposed to be the best time of the year, every year?"
"It is the best time of the year, but not every year. You made so much difference in my life in more ways than one. My smile is genuine again and I never thought that will happen. You redeemed Christmas for me."
"I still can't believe you'd pursue me, you know? Who am I except the for the girl you met five years ago and walked away with nothing but a blurry photo. I mean, look at you, and look at me. I'm not a head turner --"
"Sure love, you don't turn heads. You stir hearts. And you have stirred mine."
I'll give it to someone, I'll give it to someone special
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Peace na tayo guys.
If it isn't yet obvious, I get inspired by songs. It helps keep my thoughts/plot organized. If you have any requests, feel free to send me a message. I'm not promising I can do it all but if I can think of something then I will :)
*This quote is borrowed from Glee.
