I saw her the moment she walked in the restaurant. She looks happy.I watched her walked while looking around.Then her eyes found mine.She beamed at me and stroll towards me.
"Hi baby boy.",she greeted happily and kiss me.She's always like this.Like she's happy when she sees me.It hurts to be the one tearing that happiness.
"Hey",is my only reply.Her smile didn't go away but I can see the confusion in her eyes.I used to be warm greeting her and returning her beautiful smile.She doesn't want to acknowledge it.Damn.She's just so sweet that I'm having second thoughts about what I'll do.
She sits and lovingly stared at me.Fuck.She has this dreamy look in her eyes."What's up,baby boy?",she asked using her endearment for me.She's so fond of calling me that as much as I am calling her my baby girl.
"Let's order first,Andrea.",I almost kick myself when I saw how my impersonal answer pained her.I wanted to end this already.I'm hurting myself more than I am trying to hurt her.
She nodded."Ok."And she tried to smile but didn't reach her eyes.Fuck me.Fuck this.But I have to do this.I just have to.
We ordered and ate in utter silence.She must have sense the tension cause she used to be a blabber.God,what am I doing?
After we ate,we said almost in unision."I have something to tell you.",she said the same I said,"We need to talk".
"You go first",I nudge.What Shes about to say must be a happy one while mine is not.Better be the good news first.
She burrowed her brows."No,you go first.",she said deteminely.
Stubborn little thing.Yep,that's my baby girl.I almost smile but then I remember I was about to break her heart along with mine.I sighed.
"Im breaking up with you."I said in a cold voice and looked at her with my flat stare.Oh fuck.The look of betrayal in her eyes but then she blurted,"Is this some kind of joke?"
I shook my head."No.I want a break-up,Andrea."I said flatly.I looked away when I saw tears gather in her eyes.Just a little bit and it'll be over.
There was a silence before she asked in tear-clogged voice,"Why?Have I done something wrong?Tell me and I'll make it up to you.Just...just don't leave me,please?",she asked and I looked at her.Wrong move.I saw her tears running down her face.I hated that she had to beg a jerk like me.Hate that she thought she did something wrong.To end her misery and mine,I answered.
"I just don't love you anymore.",that must be the biggest lie cause I love her so damn much.So much that I wanted to kill myself when I hear her sob in agony.I'm so sorry,I wanted to tell her.
"That's it?,she asked.
I can't do this anymore."That's it",I said.
"If it makes you happy,then be it,Nyle.Goodbye."she said then stood up and leave.
I wanted to tell her it didn't make me happy.I wanted to run after her and apologize.I wanted to tell her that I love her still damn much.But I didn't.Because it's the right thing to do.
