personality disorder (kellic)

chapter 12

When I wake up I promise myself I am so done with all substances. I can't stand hang overs and it's not even worth it any more. Last night is sort of a blur so I'm very confused as to where the fuck I am. The room is unfamiliar and minimalistic, with only a simple dresser and a TV occupying the room besides the bed I'm on. I contemplate just staying in the warm, comfy bed longer but my mouth tastes terrible and I can't deal anymore. I stumble from the room, squinting my eyes in an attempt to block out the sun shining from a window in the hall. I quickly realize I'm in Vic's house and locate the nearest bathroom to steal mouthwash.

After taking care of myself, I excite the bathroom, running right into Vic. he's cleaned and freshly showered, his perfect hair falling in cute wet ringlets. Seeing him brings back a flood of memories of last night and it's like someone turned up my internal heater, causing the blood to boil to my face and neck. I kissed him. God I bet my breath smelled. I bet I smelled.

"I called your mom. She'll be here in a few minutes." Vic says emotionlessly, looking past me. I frown but nod. I should have guessed he'd be like this. At least he didn't punch me. It still kind of hurts though. I don't know why. It's not like I like the nerd or something.

"Great. I had a good time last night Viccy. Let's do it again real soon." I say, trying to block out my confusing feelings. Vic for once doesn't reply and walks off into a room, I presume his, shutting the door softly. A car horn honks outside so I forget about Vic for now and go outside to leave with my annoyed mother.

//

Since I got suspended for the week, I spend the rest of the day sleeping and recovering from the nights fiascos. I try to forget about what happened between me and Vic. I mean it's just a dumb drunken kiss. I've had tons, and usually done a lot more then kiss. But for some reason Vic's stupid soft lips are stuck on my mind. I'm not surprised when my mom tells me that my appointment with Vic is canceled for Tuesday. He's most likely going to stop seeing me all together. I'm not as excited about that as I would have been a couple weeks ago. I find myself actually wanting to talk to him.

On Tuesday, the day I was supposed to see Vic, I decide to text mike to hang out. He's suspended like me so he's probably as bored as I am. I'm also hoping to see Vic. whatever.

Mike doesn't reply quickly when he does, it's to tell me he can't do anything. I groan out loud, annoyed.

Me: why not :(

Mike: Vic's bein an asshole. Idk what happened on Sunday? Hes been weird since that night.

I take a minuet to respond to him. I don't know if I want to tell him. I mean it was just a stupid kiss and it didn't even mean anything. But I kind of want to keep it between us. It's dumb and doesn't make much sense but it feels weird to consider telling mike anything.

Me: idk I was pretty drunk. Hes probably just scarred from seeing me mostly naked throwing up lol

Mike: well sorry. I'll try and get him to chill out. Ttyl

I let out a long sigh and stare up at my plain ceiling replaying the hazy scene from Sunday over and over in my head. Maybe he didn't enjoy it as much as I thought. I mean I was incredibly drunk. I probably just got somethings wrong. I most likely made a fool of myself. Again.

I groan, rolling over to bury my face in my pillows. I'm such an idiot. Why can't I just go back to the way I used to be? I want to get this stupid jerk out of my head but I can't and now he's giving me the cold shoulder. Well whatever. He messed up my head and I'll be damned if I let him just ignore me. He wanted to fix me but he's only fucked me up even more. I make a snap decision and climb out of my bed, throwing on a pair of jeans and a random shirt and grab my shoes.