The Feels

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It feels so lonely
How do I translate this feeling?

My heart beats with inconsistence
It twists inside my chest, like it's trying to break itself

Sometimes I cry because it's just so hard to breathe in
Why do we care so much what people think?

It feels so hollow
How do I translate this feeling?

Why do I cry when my family hurts me
I've lived and I've learned that no one deserves me

That my tears don't mean a thing
Except that God is close to me

I haven't lost yet I feel as though I've lost it all
Look at me through different perspectives and you get the same image

It feels so cruel
How do I translate this feeling?

Like life decided it was funny to play a joke on me
Give me a life I have no access to, and no control over

Watch me try to claim a love that isn't mine
Watch my divine light dull so that I no longer shine

It feels so painful
How do I translate this feeling?

Like someone is trying to choke me
Then drown me, only to revive me

It becomes meaningless to go on
What am I fighting this ruthless battle for

Hope, faith, love?

Please show yourself so I can
Get a mere glimpse of your beauty, your wholeness

It feels so empty
How do I translate this feeling?

Like I am a shadow, plagued
To walk in the midst of a sea of people

And not a single one of them will ever know the real me

I dare not show my sadness, my pain, for what, I have every reason be 'happy'

It feels so somber
How do I translate this feeling?

To know that in all I loved I loved alone
And that I am but a drifter, Never found my heart a home


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