My Horrible Ex-Husband

Chapter Fourteen: A Most Horrible Visit

I buttoned my shirt up, tucking it into a pair of blue jeans, as I glanced at myself in the mirror. I guess this was ok to wear to my mom’s place. My mother had decided that she wanted to have a family dinner and wanted all of her wonderful children to be there. That meant all of my sister’s would be there – Joy. Family dinner with my sisters meant that they would want to know all of my business – how was my job? How are the kids? How’s your love life? Seeing anyone?

I’m certain my mother had told them about Eli and I’s complicated relationship, which he simply put as “We’re getting back together.” News of Eli and I’s rekindling was going to be the hottest topic of dinner conversation since I told them that he and I were getting divorced. If I remember correctly, my mother broke down into tears when I told her about Eli and I’s crumbling relationship. All she kept saying was “What about the kids? Stay together for the kids!” But as most divorcees know staying together for the sake of the kids is the worse idea ever. Living in the same home and being separated was just plain stupid. Eli and I needed to be more than “separated” at the time. We needed a city in between us.

“Caleb! Are you ready?” Eli asked barging into my bedroom without as much as a knock.

“Ready for what?” I said glancing at him to see he was fully dressed.

“Your mother’s family dinner,” Eli replied casually. How did he know about the family dinner? I made sure I erased the message on the answer machine. I didn’t tell him about it. Fuck. My mother must have called him.

“Eli, I don’t want you to coming with me,” I huffed, firmly placing my foot down on the whole idea.

“And why not? Your mother personally invited me,” Eli retorted. “It would be rude not to go.”

“Because we aren’t officially anything yet,” I replied. “I don’t want my sisters getting the wrong idea.”

“Caleb,” Eli said grabbing my hand. “We’re in progress, ok? If your sisters ask, we are working through it. I mean you know how your family is you’ll want me by your side. I’ll deflect.”

I narrowed my eyes. He was right. My family does drive me crazy and I guess I would need someone there to keep me sane, even if it was Eli. I could control Eli. My sisters, on the other hand, were an entirely different story. I nodded, agreeing with him for once as much as I didn’t want to. So, he, I and the kids, took the drive up to my mom’s place again. Hell must have frozen over by now – Two visits to my mom’s house in a month – The devil must be an Eskimo. I sighed as I glanced at the familiar cars in the driveway of my sisters. I already knew this was going to be weird.

As soon as we walked through the front door, the cackling voices of Carrie, Camilla and Christine echoed throughout the house. Carrie was the oldest, followed by Christine, Me and then Camilla. Yes, I grew up with all sisters and they are most likely the reason I’m gay. Living with four women for your entire life would turn the straightest of men into a flaming homo.

“Caleb? How are you?” Carrie asked gripping me into a hug. “Oh – You’re kids are so big. I haven’t seen them in forever it feels like.”

Carrie was the most annoying out of all of my sisters. She was too friendly, and always stuck her nose into everyone’s business.

“You actually showed up,” Christine snorted her voice dripping with sarcasm. She and I never got along. We were the closest in age, and we always fought over everything and anything including boys. Lastly, there was Camilla – sweet, young and innocent, the baby of the family. She was my favorite out of my sisters, but a bit of a spoiled brat. There was no denying that they were my mother’s children. Me, on the other hand, I was questionable. I was exactly like my father. It was no wonder he had skipped out on us.  Among these women, I was an outcast.