Reckless [Dean Winchester]

Epilogue

"I may be the King of Hell, but I'm not soulless."

I scoff. I'd think the whole point of being a demon would be that you don't have a soul.

"Since you didn't say goodbye, I'm giving you a chance to. I'm sure you already figured out he can't see you or hear you. But don't make it too long, we've got to get you moved in."

I feel like I want to say "thank you" to Crowley, but knowing he landed me here, I can't bring myself to say the words. Instead, I turn back to Dean and walk through molasses to get to him.

The sight grows more pitiful through my walk. He's taken me into his arms, bloodying himself in the process. My eyes twitch at seeing how blank and staring my body's eyes are. It's weird. This isn't like looking in a mirror, it's so much different.

Dean shakes, bent over my broken body. I sit on my knees across from him. No matter what I say, no matter what I do, he won't know. He doesn't know that I'm here. He doesn't know that I'm watching. He'll never know unless Crowley tells him, but I doubt the King of Hell ever will.

"Oh, Dean," I whisper mournfully as I see his vulnerability break him. He closes my eyes, which makes it a little more comfortable for me.

"You didn't deserve it," he mumbles. "You deserved so much better. You didn't deserve this. You never did. You didn't deserve me, either, Max."

"That's not true," I say softly. "Your life doesn't define you, you do." I look down at my knees. "You have a side to you that most don't see. You have the biggest heart that I've ever known anyone to have. If anything, you don't deserve this. You deserve something great." I reach over my head to touch his shoulder. Not that he'll feel it. "I hope you get out of this someday. You and your brother both."

"I'll kill that son of a bitch," he snarls. "I'll make sure he doesn't get away with this again, Max. I...If I could pull you out, I would. But I'm not an angel."

"But you are special." My voice is trembling. "And don't let anyone ever tell you different. I saw how special you are, Dean. I see it. I just wish you could see it too." I bite my lip.

"Dean!"

My head turns to see Sam has made his way onto the scene. From the corner of my eye, I see Dean look up, his face flushed and wet from tears. Sam braces himself against one of the doors, the shock registering on his face. He doesn't go to his brother, he keeps his distance.

I want to hold Dean, tell him in some way that I'm okay, as okay as I can be as a dead girl ready to go to Hell. All I can do is watch helplessly as the eldest Winchester mourns over my corpse while the youngest watches his older brother show his heart on his sleeve.

"Dean," Sam tries awkwardly. "He was...he was right. This...this is where her family used to live." He clears his throat awkwardly.

I feel an anvil suffocate me. This is where her family used to live.

"We were close, Sammy. This fucking close. And...and..." Dean shakes violently. "And it wouldn't have mattered. They left. She would have come back to an empty house. We would have left her here, on her own, again."

I flinch when I feel the hand on my shoulder.

"Time to go, Max." It's the first time Crowley has addressed me by my nickname, the one I actually like and respond to without disdain.

Sniffling, I stand up slowly. My eyes remain on Dean. I don't want to leave him like this. I half turn to Crowley, who's got a rather sinister smile on his face. He has a hand extended for me, reaching. I put my hand to be level with his, but I hesitate. My face quivers in anger as I meet Crowley's dark eyes. I really do hope that Dean or Sam kills him one day. I know it won't bring me back, but I'll feel better.

I place my hand in Crowley's, and his fingers curl around it.

"Welcome home, Max."

**[holds readers dying of feels] I know, you guys, I know. It wasn't easy to write off Max like I had, and it especially wasn't easy to write this ending. I mean, to have Max killed in her own home...And the Winchesters would've dropped her off to an empty home...

It's just heartbreaking. *wipes tear from eye* Yes, I feel emotion too. I can only be soulless for so long when I write.

I always knew Max's story was going to end this way, from the time I knew she was going to have made a crossroads deal with Crowley. I just knew...

And, now as I write this, I realize Dean and Max never got to the "I love you" point in their relationship...**