Mistletoe & Dark Vala: YuleTide at Angband [Lord of the Rings]

Mistletoe & Dark Vala

"Actually, you were supposed to be Varda...I thought you gathered that from the jewels I glued to your hair," Melkor snorted, but began to snigger at the memory, it was a really good Yule and he even got his own pet Fellbeast...pity one of those stupid dragons ate him...well there was always the possibility of another one this year.

"Yes, and I had to cut off three inches of my hair because of the glue...THREE INCHES MASTER!" Sauron wailed, and then purposefully tugged his hair into a ponytail and stuck it down his scaled armour. He was still extremely sore about that. "And you dragged me through the dungeons...all the prisoners saw...it was degrading and not one of them could take me seriously after that. Torturing loses its appeal when the torturee starts making flirtatious innuendos!"

Well that just about did it, Melkor practically fell off his throne in a fit of spluttering and belly-aching laughter. It took him a solid twenty minutes to bring his obnoxious cackling down to a mild chortle, and with each passing moment Sauron fumed all the harder, his face matching his hair in hue...he really did hate Yuletide!

"Oh, my ribs hurt," Melkor giggled from his upside down position at the bottom of his throne, his legs resting on the seat and his back on the ground as he snorted and squealed like a delighted piglet.

"IT WAS NOT FUNNY!" Sauron snapped, as he stepped over his master and stalked off down the marble steps, with literal flames rippling off his person.

"Saaaaurooon, come back!" Melkor whinged, as he rolled onto his belly and pouted some more. "I need my treeees, and my roast beast, and gifts...Sauron? Sauron? WELL I CANNOT GO MYSELF!!!"

Sauron paused mid stride, and ever so gently twisted his head to the side to regard his Master with the faintest smirk...

"Well, you should of thought of that before your disgraced me," and with that said, Melkor's closest ally and friend, deserted him with a prim little strut out of the throne room.

Melkor stared, mouth agape. He was not accustomed to not getting his own way - well he was but only when dealing with his ridiculous brother - but that wasn't the point!

The dark Vala was conflicted, usually in the instance of not getting his own way he would throw a raging tantrum and go on a murderous rampage, destroying everything in his wake, but he didn't feel like doing that...he felt sort of...sad.  Yuletide was no fun without Sauron at his side, lighting up Wargs for the giggles, or roasting slaves on the open fire, their screams made such good background music for the orc carolling.

And then Melkor had a horrible thought; if Sauron would not help him celebrate Yule then who would sit up with him to the wee hours doing impressions of those simpleminded, prissy, good for nothing, joy killers, that he once had the great displeasure of calling family! That was his favourite part of Yuletide, he loved it more than getting presents...well...marginally more.

Melkor's pout wobbled...was he going to have to spend Yuletide alone?

No presents, no setting fire to unsuspecting minions, no withered wreaths or hacked up fir trees dressed in pretty black bows (manly evil bows of course), and no Sauron...no favoured minion to plot and scheme and cackle evilly with?

Well this was shaping up to be a truly despicable Yuletide indeed!

Meanwhile...

Somewhere in the dungeons of Angband, Sauron was feeling very proud of himself!

Not only had he convinced his Master that he was still cut up over last year's dress-up debacle, but he'd successfully distracted him from the master plan at hand...the Annual Angband Yuletide Festivity!