Brick by Brick

Part Twenty Five

Sammy tried to smile, but the tears were winning, "I know what the right thing to do is, but I don't feel strong enough to deal with it. Not yet."

Corinne squeezed her hands, "and you don't have to do anything today, just promise me you'll think about it, and talk to me?"

Sammy nodded then stood, "I need to get back to Monica, you want to come and see her?"

She shook her head, "no. That's not the best idea. I'll come over tonight? Catch up?"

"That'd be great. Thanks, you are the best."

Later that afternoon she got back to the house, dealing with her inner turmoil but knowing she also had to face the demons within her home too. Joel. Not that he was a demon. He was anything but; it was what had happened and how they played it now that was weighing her down...that and the fact that she might be genetically predisposed to breast cancer. She had no idea how the hell to deal with that either.

Actually she did, Eleanor was everything to her, and she'd do anything to make sure she was there for her for as long as is humanely possible. But the test would bring answers and possibly solutions, and she was still feeling fraught, and wasn't able to cope with what that would mean at the moment. She had to bury it, for a while, she had to regain control of everything else first. It was the only way.

As she opened the front door, she could hear Eleanor's squeals and she hadn't stepped into the hallway when her daughter came staggering towards her in what was a run by her standards, screeching and laughing, behind her came Joel on his knees, a furry toy cat balanced on his head, and roaring like a wild animal. Eleanor grabbed her legs, burying her face between her knees and Sammy laughed.

Then he met Sammy's eyes and blushed. Sitting back on his heels, he took the animal down and offered an awkward smile, "you ok?"

She nodded, "yep. She's home tomorrow hopefully...so I've got a lot to do."

Eleanor peeked out from her mother's legs and spotting the monster defeated, turned and ran to Joel almost flying into his arms. Sammy couldn't help but be overwhelmed by the burst of pain that hit her chest, he was so perfect, he'd slotted in to her life and been a rock, and she'd responded by kissing him, then blanking him. She had to make it right.

Standing, with Eleanor still wrapped around his neck he looked at her for a moment, "I should go then."

That caused her to panic, "I don't want you to go...I..."

He smiled at her confusion, "I don't think your mother needs me hanging around seeing her at her worst."

His comment was proving that he knew her well, knew how her mother would feel. And again she felt dreadful.

"Corinne and Mike are coming over later; I thought we could get some takeaway, bottle of wine..."

Giving a knowing nod he set Eleanor on the floor then patted her on the bottom.

"What? What does that mean?"

Shrugging he stared at her for a moment, "you want me to hang around yet you make sure we're chaperoned at every opportunity. Think I'm untrustworthy? Think I'm about to pounce or something?"

Stunned, she stared at him for a moment, but before she could answer he turned on his heel and made to follow Eleanor, "stop. It's not like that."

He glanced over his shoulder, "I think it is."

Then he was gone.

Sammy was fraught, she should chase after him, but she needed a shower, needed time to work her head out. She'd speak to him when she was controlled, calm and back in charge.