Hey There, Delilah - A 5 Seconds of Summer story

Chapter 37

“You remembered my favourite animal.”

I blushed. “As if I could forget. You had penguins on everything.”

We shared a laugh.

It was easy, so blissfully easy, to remember when I was around Luke. All the memories from my childhood involving him didn’t have pain or memories of my mother.

We’d been best friends and we’d been so happy. So happy just to have each other.

I used to think that Luke was all I needed. Well, him and chocolate.

What had changed?

Well, I grew up, in the most painful of ways.

“Hey, Del. Del. You with me?”

I blinked back to reality to see Luke waving a hand in front of my face and watching me with an amused smile.

“Sorry.” I murmured, blushing and dropping my head.

Spacing out into my thoughts was one of my bad habits. I held back a cynical smile. Honestly, it was the least of my worst habits, and the least dangerous.

“You were thinking too hard again.” Luke teased, leaning back against the seat. “You always used to do that when we were kids. We’d be playing or talking or jamming and you’d just space out, getting lost in your thoughts. Sometimes for ages.”

“I was thinking about our childhood.” I said, pensively. “It was so easy back then.”

Luke looked like he wanted to say something, but stopped. “Yeah, I guess. But we didn’t understand anything then. We thought everything was easy. That everything would work out.”

“That no one would ever hurt us.” I continued, quietly. “That no one would ever die. That the world believed in us, helped us. That we were immortal. We were reckless, thinking that the world owed us a debt to be kind. We were innocent. We’re not anymore.”

“This is a deep conversation.” Luke noted, trying desperately to sound light. “Are all your thoughts this deep?”

I laughed, allowing Luke to change the subject back to a happier place for now. “Only every once in a blue moon.”

Luke laughed and the tension was eased somewhat.

But I knew we’d come back to this discussion because Luke never forgot. He had the memory of a goddamn elephant, and he would come back and talk to me about my morbid thoughts because he, and only he (except maybe Jules) could hear the hidden pain laced in my words.

And for some weird reason, he’d made it his duty to fix that pain.

The thought of Luke as some sort of hero overtook my fanciful imagination, a part of me that I only ever allowed myself to tap into while writing songs.

I glanced at him.

His position was relaxed, but he was watching me protectively, his mouth lifting up into a smile when he caught me looking.

I blushed at the sight of it.

Then internally slapped myself for blushing. I was doing way too much of it nowadays.

But the thought remained.

Maybe Luke Hemmings was my hero after all.

The thought made me brave.

Luke had been my best friend once, and now he knew almost all my secrets.

I could trust him now, I was sure of it.

So, I took a deep breath and sat up straighter.

Luke’s gaze shot to me immediately.

“Want to go for a swim?” I asked, trying not to show my nerves in my voice.

He grinned. “Sure thing.”

He got to his feet, clad only in his blue board shorts and showing off his muscular chest with the hint of a six-pack.

Now that wasn’t fair.

Taking another deep breath and biting my lip, I took his proffered hand and got to my feet.

Relax. He won’t judge you. I told myself.

Reluctantly I slipped off my towel, leaving me dressed only in my bikini and forced myself to look Luke straight in the eyes.

He sucked in a breath as his eyes travelled down my body and stopped at the thin, red slashes that scarred my upper thighs.

“Delilah.” He breathed, reaching towards my waist.

I jerked away, tears burning in my eyes.

This had been a horrible mistake.

I shouldn’t have let anyone see them.

Shouldn’t have let Luke Hemmings see the visual representation of my weakest moments.

Ignoring him as he said my name, I walked away from the others, up to the deepest part of the pool.

Then I jumped off the side.

For a moment I recalled the jetty-jumping incident with some panic, but I controlled myself in seconds.

I was in broad daylight in a swimming pool and everyone could see me now.

Everyone could see my scars.

As I hid myself under the water, I allowed the tears to fall.

Can you even cry underwater?

Either way, if anyone noticed I could blame it on the chlorine.

But I had to come up for air eventually.

I kicked to the wavering picture of the ceiling and burst through the surface, gasping and slicking my hair back from my face as I tread through the water.

I wiped my eyes free of chlorinated water and when I opened them, Luke was treading water beside me shaking his wet hair and sending droplets in every direction.

“I’m sorry.” He whispered, catching my eyes. His own tightened when he recognised the tears.

The boy knew me better than he knew himself, I never could hide anything from him.

“It’s not your fault.” I muttered. “And I’m not angry. Everybody stares, don’t apologise.”

“They’re not ugly, you know.” Luke said, after a moment. “They’re a part of you. They tell a story of you that not many people know.”

We’d drifted into shallower waters, and I could just get my tippy-toes to touch the cool tiles. The others were still a fair way away, respecting our need for privacy.

“It’s a story I don’t want anyone to know.” More tears trickled out.

Damn it all, can I not cry for one day?

Blame it on the chlorine.

Luke, who could stand flat-footed thanks to his gigantic height, stepped closer, catching my hips between his hands and running his thumbs along the scars.

I bowed my head in shame.

“Don’t be ashamed of your past.” Luke whispered, leaning his head down to my ear. “It made you who you are now. These scars tell a story of your strength, Del. They are a part of you and for that, they’re beautiful.”

With my eyes swimming, I turned my head up to look at Luke in wonder.

He smiled sadly. “I’m still sorry you had to go through such pain.”

He pressed a soft kiss to my forehead and wrapped his arms around me, letting me drift up to stand on demi-point on his feet.

“You’re so beautiful, Delilah Cook.” Luke said, softly. “So goddamn beautiful, and don’t you ever forget it.”