Roses are not always red

Roses

My dad gave me roses, becuse of mom. We was at her graveplace. My mom died in a car-accident, and my dad nearly died, nothing happend to me. I was alone, no friends, or anything. I was also diagnosed "Depression" , but i don't trust it.

My life has been a mess the last years, and my thougts was psycho.. I am not a cutter, becuse it will not solve the problems at all. I don't really have time for "friends" , becuse I am in and out of the hospital all the time, becuse they think I can't eat well. Bit**es all of them.

I can control myself, I am nearly a grown woman.. I feel me like 10 years older, becuse of the things i have been through. 

I like to draw. Its the only thing were I can be myself. I draw feelings. It's just a clear notebook. I like dolls, becuse they are just there, and can't just go from you while you are gone. 

My world is insane.

School is a nightmare.

All humans I know is too boring.

I went to school, I was like a ghost. Nobody noticed me. I sat at my disk, and taken away by my thougts. Someone was yelling in the schoolyard:" Find one that not matters to you, or you all will pay one day." I ran, and ran. School just got a bigger nightmare.. I did'ent understood anything..