The Fighter Meets The Alpha

~13~

"Why? What aren't you telling me?" Logan asks, I wasn't looking at him. I don't think I could take it. His voice sounded hurt, and that just made me feel even more guilty. Before I could say anything he continued.

"Max... You can trust me," he murmured. That's when something snapped and I completely lost any control I had.

"Logan, don't you think the reason I didn't tell you everything was because I couldn't? Because I couldn't bring back the entire dark past I have, bring back the memories of the unspeakable fucked up shit I've done in my life by force? You forget that my upbringing wasn't exactly perfect or great. It was far from it. I don't trust people because they always end up hurt in the end and it's my fault, everything is always my fault. I try, Logan. I'm trying, but I can't help it if I wake up scream and can't talk about it. It's just what happens with me. You truly don't understand exactly how hard I try to forget my past, but I never can because it literally is scared onto my skin!" I yell.

I stop and walk away from him, I needed space, I needed to breathe that wasn't near him because I can't think around him. I never have been able to and now isn't going to be any different.

I lock myself in the bathroom again. It wasn't the "space" I was looking for, but it put a wall between me and Logan. That's what I needed right now. I can't face him. I can't face him as the memories flooded back in as I remembered them.

"Come on, sweetheart, just tell us your name," the tall buff guy said sweetly, but I could see right through him.

"Never." I spit the blood that was in my mouth at his face.

He growls in anger and his hands start to shake. I smirk at his reaction and knowing fully what he is going to do next.

"Chain her up!" the guy yells.

Just then two more guys come in and untie my hands and legs from the chair I was in and dragged me over to a stone wall with think heavy chains hanging off it.

I would fight back I would always fight back, but I was to weak from the last time. The guys dragging me cuffed the chains to my wrists- to tight, like always.Then the first guy comes in holding a whip... again... like always.

"Are you going to do that again to me, sweetheart? Because if you are, we are both going to have an issue," he sneers.

"I make no promises." I smirk, the blood covering my teeth showing.

He didn't reply but instead he whips my back. Hard. I bite my lip just as hard to stop the scream the threatened to come out. My lips is now bleeding, filling my mouth with the disgusting metallic taste of blood again. I clench my fists, nails digging into my palms, probably making them bleed too.

Every time the guys whips my back the harder I clench my fists.

"Scream girl!" he yells at me.

"Never," I said in a low, strained voice that sounded unfamiliar even to myself.

He continues to whip my back until I black out from blood loss and pain. Little did I know, they already knew my name.

I scream out as tears stream down my face. I punched the wall then continue to bag my fist against it lighter, less painfully.

I sob to myself, knowing all too well that Logan is standing on the other side of the door trying to get in, but I can't hear any of it.

I rip my shirt off and began pulling off the bandages off my shoulder. I stood there in my bra, looking ashamed in the mirror. I found a pair of scissors in a draw and started to cut the stitches out of my shoulder and puling them out, making them to bleed slightly. More scars to add to the collection. 

I turn around and inspect my back from over my should in the mirror. Tears spring back to my eyes as I see them again. At least they weren't the only things I say in the image of me. I had my tattoo. 

My blue and black roses linked together by a chair of black and grey thorn filled vines taking up the entirety of my side. In the middle of it all, hidden in a cluster of vines was the name Maria. I go this done just for her, in her memory.

I start to sob again. My whole life is a complete failure. Nothing good has come of it. Nothing ever. Eighteen years of absolute hell, and I just put up with all of it building walls out of concrete around myself and making my soul into ice, but that wasn't who I was. I was just a fragile girl who put on a facade of being okay. I was slowly breaking down inside, everything that was at bay for years is finally catching up to me now, in this exact moment.

None of this was supposed to be known by anyone other than me, but then Logan came into my life. The ray of light filling the darkness of myself, slowly repairing my the cracks unknowingly. He was the good thing that happened in my life and he was stuck with me. Me. He deserves so much more.

I turn back around face the sink. With shaky hands I open up the cabinet and looked at the razor sitting there. I picked it up and held it at eye level before slowly bring it down onto my wrist.

I screamed out again and threw the blade into the sink, running over to the door and flinging it open and throwing myself in Logan's arms. I couldn't go back to that, I would be able to stop this time and I would end up dead in my own blood. 

Logan's arms wrapped around my waist bringing me close to him. He buried his face in my neck as his arms tightened more around me. We stayed like that for god knows how long but we later pulled apart and I wiped my eyes with the back of my hands  and slowly turned to get my shirt again.

Logan caught my wrist stopping my movement forward. I felt his hand run down my back, following a scar all the way down. I stiffened against his touch, forgotten in the moment that he didn't know about that part of the story.

"What happened?" Logan whispered in a raspy voice.

"You are just finding out everything today, aren't you Logan?" I smiled bitterly into the mirror in front of me.

"What happened?" he repeated.

"I got whipped." 

"By who?"

"A person who kidnapped me."

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HULLO MY GIRAFFES!!!!!!

Here's chapter 13! Tell me how it was and if you liked it or not! 

Again, sorry for the long periods of not updating, finals are coming up soon and my teachers are being dicks and whatnot so I don't get much time to write.

And I also recently found that I'm addicted to Riverdale and binged watched that instead of updating, sorry not sorry =]

Love ya all!

Bye For Now My Crazy Griaffes! Be Crazy! Stay Awesome! BELIEVE! LOVE YOUR STUFFED ANIMALS! COMMENT!!!!!!!