He Speaks Suicide (Phan AU)

1.

Phil's POV

"Alright Phil, are you ready for your first day at school?" My mum asks as I come down the stairs of our new home.

"I guess," I say as I make my way to the kitchen.

The scent of pancakes and bacon fills my nose as I take a seat at the table. I eat my breakfast and I see my little sisters, Kaydence and Josephine, come down the stairs. The two come up to me and give me a hug and kiss my cheek. I know many people don't like their younger siblings, but I love mine. They're so easy to take care of and my life would be worse if I didn't have them in it. Kaydence tells me about how her friend from back home's birthday is coming up and she wants to get her an Elsa doll, since both love the Disney movie Frozen.

I notice the time and panic. I quickly shove one last bight of my breakfast in my mouth before downing the rest of my milk.

 "I have to go! I don't want to be late on my first day!" I grab my book bag and jacket before giving my mum and the girls a peck on the cheek and running out the door.

I walk to the bus stop and take my headphones out of my bag. I put on "Just One Yesterday" by Fall Out Boy. I hum the tune of the song as I wait for the bus with the rest of the students. When the bus comes, we all pile on and I find an empty seat in the middle. I slide onto the seat and pull myself over to the window.

I stare out the window when I feel the seat dip down. I turn and see a girl with blonde, curly hair and a warm smile. I take my headphones off and smile in return.

"Hi, my name's Carrie," the girl says.

"Hey. I'm Phil," I reply.

"You must be new, cause I've never seen you here before," She laughs lightly, making me blush.

"Uh, yeah. It's my first day." I chuckle.

For the rest of the way to school, we talk and I get to know her. I learn I have art, literature, maths, and science with her. I also learn she has little brothers, a two-year-old named Tommy and a four-year-old named Josh. I tell her about Kaydence and Josie and how they're the same ages as her two brothers. We talk about where I moved from and discuss our favorite subjects. I feel like the two of us will be great friends.

The bus pulls up the the drop off lane. Carrie stands up and I follow her movements as we left the vehicle. She took a look at the schedule I had and what locker I was at. She walked me over to it, smiling as I placed some of the text books I had in there. 

We walked to art together, us both walking in and taking a seat at the front. 

Dan's POV

I sit in the back of the class by myself. Everyone else has a partner but me, and that's fine. I get out my sketch pad and flip to that same picture of clear blue eyes I've been drawing for so long. I added a bit more detail to the pair, even sketching in some eyebrows. 

"Okay class. Before we start today, we have a new student," Ms. McKinnon says.

I continue to look down at my drawing while she speaks. I hear a few wolf whistles and glance up from my work at the figure standing at the front of the room. He's really tall and wearing a jumper with foxes on it. His hair was kinda like mine, but the other way? Does that makes sense?

"Um, hi. My name's Phil Lester and just moved here. I like music and I'm happy to meet you all," the boy, whose name I now know is Phil, says shyly.

"Great. Well Phil, you can take a seat next to Daniel in the back," she says and I swear under my breath.

"I'm sorry, what was that Mr. Howell?" She glares suspiciously. I cower under her strong gaze as she fixes her glasses.

"N-nothing Ms. McKinnon," I stutter quietly. I keep my eyes on him as the boy sits down.

"Hi, I'm Phil," he says and I turn to look at him.

My eyes widen when I see his. I look down at the picture and the eyes from my dreams match Phil's blue ones perfectly. I quickly close my book and look down at the desk. A wave of embarrassment washes over me and I just look down, not wanting to make eye contact in fear that I'll stare too long. 

"H-hi. Um, I'm Dan," I say quietly and awkwardly.

The teacher begins lecturing, but I don't pay close attention. I think it's something about how shadows work in paintings. I can only think of the similarity between Phil's eyes and the eyes I've drawn. It's absolutely wild that they just so happen to be the same. 

I've never even met this kid before. How the hell did I sketch his eyes before I even knew him?

I sneak a look at Phil and his eyes, but he catches me and flashes an unforgettable smile. The kindness in it gives me an incredibly warm feeling and makes my heart flutter.

Wow.

Phil's POV

School ends and I make my way out of my social studies class with Carrie. We walk down the hall when I hear loud and obnoxious laughing.

"I'll be back," I say and follow the sound.

"Where are you going?" She shouts, but it fades away as I quicken my pace.

I see a group of people laughing and pointing at a boy with brown hair as he walks to his locker and stands in front of it. I try to get closer so I can see better. The laughing continued as the figure shook with what seemed to be tears.

Go kill yourself. Faggot. Ugly. Worthless. Keep cutting. Waste of space. 

Those were what the papers on his locker said.

"Oh no no no," I say as I see people who were getting bored start leaving the scene.

I get a better look at the one now staring lifelessly at the locker. It was the quiet boy from art...Dan, I think? Yeah, his name was Dan. I run up to him and try to think of something to say. Nothing comes out, so I do the only thing I think would help and gently wrap my arms around his shoulders.

He jumps. "What the hell are you doing?"

"I-it's me, Phil," I say calmly. "From first hour."

Although he remains tense, I can tell he remembers me. He stands still and lets me hold him, which is how we stay until the halls clear, ignoring the judgmental looks people give us. 

"Who did this?" I ask, referring to the cruel messages.

"Why do you care?" He asks, looking down. I remove my arms from around him, suddenly acutely aware of a loss of his warmth.

"Because nobody should be called or told to do any of those things," I reply, taking the papers down and putting them in the recycling bin.

"You don't even know me," Dan says, looking me in the eyes.

"I don't have to know you to know you don't deserve any of this," I say and hug him again. He responds by silently hugging me back, and I smile.

Authors note: HEY GUYS!!! Welcome to my new phanfic. I hope you all have fun reading it as much as I have fun writing it. I literally came up with the idea for this at 1 am at my friend's house, so yeah XD also don;t ask why that's the song it's just a great bop

I hope you enjoyed it!! I love you like I love my bed!!!

-Mia