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MY PERSONAL LIFE HAD BECOME FRENETIC by early 1962. It and my job were both stressful. Charlie and I tried to get together often but on most weekends trains carried me to Toronto and back, often writing on Dad's typewriter, for visits with Babcia. The wedding was set for May 26 in the chapel of the Newman Club at U of T, followed by a reception at our house. There were countless details....
In March, the second Canadian Conference on Education was held in Montreal. I spent a week in the convention hotel, the Queen Elizabeth, working harder than ever. But other persons made my bed, planned and served meals, set each day's agenda. Having to look after just me felt like a vacation.
If someone had suggested that I pay close attention to the hotel itself because four years later I would edit its guest magazine, I would have laughed. On my only free evening I went out.
A member of McGill's Newman Centre whom I'd known since 1954, Bob Keyserlingk, took me to his family home for supper. Because his parents and brothers were all active in different directions, the conversation covered a lot of ground. Asked about my fiance, I summarized Charlie's attitude toward the audience of his newscasts: He studied Kingston's history and demographics, kept track of every important person, kept his mind and eyes open as he moved around, and built newscasts in appropriate proportions. The owner of CKLC had told him he enjoyed watching the station's audience grow steadily.
Despite the stresses, I enjoyed that spring. The fact that a writer can create anywhere, almost regardless of whatever else she or he is doing, offsets the solitude and deadlines. While I did housework, walked or rode, shopped or showered, my mind was free to draft texts or edit ones in progress. My memory got so much exercise that eventually I could outline entire articles in my head and produce a good first draft.
Major retailers such as Birks and Eaton's had bridal registries for gifts. All one had to do was identify wanted items, patterns and quantities, and the stores kept track of purchases. There were special magazines and newspaper supplements about brides and weddings. But Canada didn't yet have "bridal shows" charging admission to large halls.
Canadian brides didn't shop in the States as they do now. My friends and I were 20-somethings with middle-class parents who generously gave advice and money, but most newly-weds had enough savings to be self-reliant after the big day. It proved we were grown up!
Traditions mattered, of course. When ethnic origins differed, people compromised. I asked both our "sides" if they liked traditional English fruitcake. Then I asked La Patisserie francaise for two tiers of pound cake topped with a third one of fruitcake, all iced with classic marzipan made with bitter almonds, one of my favourite things.
Religious practices complicated matters for some couples, but we were both RCs. A traditional Polish wedding involves musicians, dancing, and food for many hours. We did without them. We weren't being cheap; we just couldn't spare time for countless decisions. We wanted only to get through the legal part, enjoy every possible minute celebrating with family and friends, and begin being married!
Incidentally, the phrase "I now pronounce you man and wife" is never uttered at an RC wedding because the Sacrament of Marriage is conferred by the pair on each other. In Canada a priest serves as the official witness for both Church and State. He makes sure all rules and regulations of both are followed strictly -- certain words must be spoken clearly and heard by other witnesses -- and then he delivers all the paperwork to Church and State records.
The Church is not a cage but rather a servant and guide when and as members need it.
Because friends were marrying and having babies in the early 1960s, Charlie and or I had to buy gifts and attend events. I enjoyed most the "trousseau teas" held by some brides' mothers before a wedding, to show off their daughters' new wardrobes. Homes became galleries for a day, guests wandered from one bedroom to another admiring clothing spread over beds and chairs, and the best china and silver held tea, coffee, and finger foods in the dining room.
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GLIMPSES of how Canada worked: a writer's memoir.
Non-FictionDuring the first 30 years of my journalistic career in the second half of the 20th century, good jobs of all kinds were available all over Canada. Those of us born in the 1930s and early '40s were in great demand because our generation was very smal...
