Idiot For Hire [On Hold]

3: World's Best Boyfriend Award Does Not Go to Mitch

“My makeup stylist will be here in five minutes,” I said. “Don’t worry.”

She nodded. “Good. I’ll be back soon.”   

“Take your time,” I said, in no mood to deal with her. After she left, my stylists slowly arrived, first Ashley and then Winona. Winona was at least an hour late, and the only choice I was left with was being unfashionably late, much to Caroline and Alana’s annoyance. Still, they chose to wait for me to finish, and it was better than not going at all. 

The work they did made up for their lateness. Winona curled my hair to perfection in a way that made Trish jealous, putting it in a pretty half-up, half-down style. Ashley did what she was best at—smoky, intense looks—perfectly matching the black bandage dress I’d picked out. Red shoes and accessories added color to my outfit, and after one last spray of my favorite perfume, I was finally ready to go.

“About time!” Caroline exclaimed, grabbing Alana and me by the arm. “Let’s go! That hottie Mitch introduced to us is already there, and I am not letting some whore whisk him away!”

“Caroline, he’s married,” Alana whispered, like Caroline’s fetish was some big secret. It wasn’t. “He’s Mitch’s married cousin.”

I tried to resist the impulse to comment on Caroline’s dilemma, but in the end, the temptation was just too sweet. “Yeah, I’m pretty sure you’re the only whore trying to whisk him away,” I said.

She narrowed her eyes at me. “Whatever. Let’s just go.”

And yes, I did relish in how she angrily stomped all the way to the limo.

The black-light party was being held at some hotel in Los Angeles. It wasn’t exactly a five-star hotel, but it wasn’t horrible, either. The music was blaring, and tall, slim bodies were writhing against each other when we walked into the room. It was too late to make a dramatic entrance now that the party was in full-blast, something Caroline and Alana greatly resented. I wasn’t sure how I would even find Mitch amidst this sea of people. Maybe I shouldn’t have come after all.

“What was this I heard from your maid about you firing your assistant?” Caroline asked as we looked around the room. She’d apparently forgotten she was mad at me.

“Mousy wasn’t working out. I have some interviews set up for Monday for a new assistant.” I chose to leave out the reason this choice was so urgent, knowing she was capable of somehow using the information against me.

“Do what I do. Hire whichever one is hotter,” she said with a grin. “Oh, that’s right. I forget you don’t want to look mediocre next to your assistant. Choose whichever one is uglier, then.” Sadly, that was what I usually did, although I would rather eat an entire chocolate cake than tell her that.

“Choose whichever one has a penis,” Alana suggested with a snicker.

“Yeah, I’m sure Mitch will love that.” Caroline snorted.

“Well… There is one,” I said, although I wasn’t sure continuing was such a good idea after all. They weren’t the most trustworthy people I knew.

“Seriously?” Caroline asked, stopping in her tracks.   

“Yeah, but he’s an absolute idiot,” I said with a laugh. It wasn’t hard to guess that Nathan wasn’t cut out for the job. “It would be a bad idea.”

“Wait. Is he hot?” Alana asked.

I let out a low whistle. “Ridiculously hot. Tall, dark, and handsome, nice body… everything.”

The moment they heard this, their eyes widened and they both got so excited and intense, it almost made me jump. “Do it!” they urged.

“No way. It’s a horrible idea,” I insisted, although in the back of my mind, I was beginning to consider the possibility. It would infuriate my mother, which was always nice…