Undefined Love (Shawn Mendes)

Shawn Peter Raul Mendes

Last night I got the opportunity to see him in person.  He walked out on stage and everyone around me screamed... I didn't.  Haha I couldn't.  He walked out on stage and I just started crying.  I was so happy.  I had looked forward to seeing him in concert for so long.  Getting my hopes up and watching them shatter constantly seems to be a theme in my life.  I was worried that this wouldn't be any different.  It was.  So I cried.  

He went through and sang a bunch of his songs.  He started playing Never Be Alone, and about at the bridge he switched to the first verse and chorus of Hey There Delilah, before going back and finishing up Never Be Alone.  

When he got to A Little Too Much he told the story behind how/why he wrote it.  He told this story about a girl that he met, that wouldn't show people when something was bothering her.  I've always had a special place in my heart for that song for... reasons.  Hearing him tell that story, I thought that that girl is me.  Not literally, but she and I think the same way.  But then the story went on, and she figured out that she could talk to her friends about things that are bothering her.  Because chances are they have been where she is.  She knew that she would be ok.  I'm not like that.  I still bottle it up.  I don't like telling people when something is bothering me.  Not even my best friend half the time.  I knew before I got to the venue that if he played that song, I would cry.  He started playing it and I immediately started sobbing.  Shawn Mendes has been there for me through his music and helped me when no one else has, so many times.  

I want to be famous one day.  Really badly actually.  I want to be in his shoes more than anything.  One thing I love is that if you follow him on instagram you see pictures and videos of him with his fans after a concert.  Last night was no different.  He had a member of his crew take a picture, and then he took a video with us.  That shows me, that he loves what he does.  It's already obvious when he is performing or making covers that he loves music.  But the pictures just go to show that he takes it more than just his job.  He loves music, he loves performing, he loves his fans.  I want to be like him.  I want people, even just one person, to listen to my music, and connect with it like I have with his.  I want someone to think that I made a difference in their life.  I want to help someone who can't help themselves.  

I wasn't front and center, but October 16, 2015 is the best night I've had.  And I thank him for that.  I thank him for cheering me up when I don't think I can do it on my own.  I thank him for loving his fans.  I thank him for more things than I'm going to tell right now.  Mostly, I thank him for being him.