"Deny me"

chapter 2

Emerald

"You filthy piece of shit", kick
"You are nothing!" Slap
"Your a burden!" Kick to the ribs
"Your dead wait! Just kill yourself!" I'm out cold.

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"Come on em", I heard her voice, but couldn't make the words out. "Come on emmy, wake up please" , she cried. Who is this? Why does there voic sound so familiar? "Emerald, baby girl", my eyes shot open and I was induffled in pain.

I groaned in pain. "Stop moving", she commanded. "What the fuck happened to me?", I opened my eyes getting adjusted to the light. I was on the floor. "Your dad", she growled. She's never liked my father as soon as she found out he abused me.

"When he gets back, if he doesn't fucking die, I'll kill him", venom dripped from her words.

"What's the damage doc?", a small smile on my lips. I didn't like having depressive things happen between us so why not lighten the mood. "I swear emerald, your my sunshine on these cloudy days".

She smiled down at me, a big toothy grin. "So, got some rib bruises, nothing broken thankfully. A bruise on your lower jaw, and-" she flipped my bangs out my face "- cutness all around". I giggled. "Help me up, this could take me five years at most".

"Alright, gottcha. 1..2..3..Up!"

"Fuck!", I screamed in pain. "I know babe, I know I'll make you a bath as soon as we get to your room.", she always used pet names in situations like this.

Put of course I don't oppose. She's just to cute- stop it emerald.

She layed me down gently on my bed and made me a bath.

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I stayed in my bath tub neck deep in bubbles (literally) while alex danced in my room to cool for the summer. "Don't tell your mother" she whispered like demi, causing me to laugh.

She continued to dance and do little cute movements. "Like my moves huh?", she joked. I turned my head blushing. She walked over to me with a mischievous smirk.

She leaned over the edge of the tub "you were checking me out", with playfulness in her eyes.

"Was not", I blushed and sprinkled some water on her face. "Was tooo", she teased. I laughed along with her "what's up, you haven't found a lover boy-" she smiled even bigger -or a lover girl".

"Um I don't know if I like girls or boys" she gauked at me "what! I would have totally helped you if you told me! Ugh, I'm so hurt", she mocked in pain.

"I don't know! I've kissed guys but not girls! I mean I have to be straight right? My dad would kill me if he found out I like the same gender".

"Fuck your dad", she growled.
"Why can't people just like who they fucking like!" She was starting to get frustrated.

"Hey, hey calm down he doesn't matter right now".

"Plus", I continued. "you know you'll be the first person I tell when I find myself", she grinned at me. "I still can't believe you've never kissed a girl before.", I rolled my eyes.

I looked back down at my dissapearing bubbles when lex gasped next to me. I flicked my head up "what?"

She just grinned harder. "Kiss me!"

"What!" I practically screamed.

Oh my goodness this cannot be happening. I've been trying to deny my crush on her for so long! Why is she doing this to me!

"Yea! Why not how do you know if you like girls or boys if you never done it before! Come on were best friends. It won't change a anything", she pouted

I know she wanted to help but she's only gonna make my crush harder to hide.

"I just want you to find yourself. One peck and if you don't like it then well stop okay?", she said. Were we really doing this right now?

Was I really about to kiss my best friend?

"Come one get out the water I want to do this proper", she handed me my towel. She looked so excited, why?

"You sure you don't want to use me as a fuck buddy?", I joked

She peared over her shoulder "if you like what I have to offer bring it baby", I blushed rapidly.

"Oh my goodness", I laughed loudly.  "Come on my lips are getting cold!"

I got out and dryed myself off (with the door closed) and got dressed in  black areopastale sweats, sports bra, and Grey tank top.

Alex was sitting on the edge of my full size bed waiting for me. "You sure you wanna do this?", I asked standing in front of her.

She took my legs and made me straddle her with them. I was so closed to her, my breath hitched.  "Are you sure you wanna do this", she countered.

I looked at the door, it was locked. "Ready", she whispered.
"If I don't like we can stop?" I asked. She scrunched her face up " of course, that would be rape. Oh hell no". I laughed and So did she.

I looked into her eyes with my arms around her neck and hers around my waist.

"I'm going in", she giggled
I nodded in approval. I felt her breath on my lips before she closed the space between us.

My lips were shaky against hers. She held me even tighter. Her lips were chapped due to the fall weather, but I loved it. I loved the way she moved against me.
But it all stopped to quickly.

We pulled away out of breath looking at each other intensively. "How was it", she breathed then grinned. I held her face in my hands and smashed my lips hard into hers again. This felt so good. It felt so right, but so fucking wrong.

I pulled her closer to me as the grip she had  on my waste moved down to ass. She squeezed it causing me to moan.

I rolled my hips into her loving the friction it was creating. I had almost forgotten I was beaten and bruised.

"Oh, god" I breathed and she slipped her tongue into my mouth. We fought for dominance but I lost. Suddenly I was in the air and flipped down on my soft bed.

Her hands were gripping my thighs and grinding into me.
She stopped sucking my lungs out and moved to my neck.

"Fuck", I breathed grinding against her.

Her hands traveled up my shirt to my breasts. I liked it and I hated myself for it. I can't do this I can't like girls. I just can't. Its not right. Its not right.

She fondled my breast and I had to fight so hard to stop. But I did. "Stop", I breathed "lex, stop it". She sat up on top of me with a confused look. "I can't do this. Not right now" I spoke panicked.

"Yea, maybe I did go to far we can always experiment another time if you want I'm guessing you liked i-" I cut her off "no! I can't experiment with you!

"Why not?"

"Because I'm not gay"

She scoffed in disbelief "okay, sure because the way you were grinding on me a minute ago was a way of showing me you didn't like it! Might I add your the one who kissed me again!"

"It was a mistake! I didn't mean to go this far! It was supposed to be one kiss! A peck". We were screaming at each other now

"I told you if you didn't like it, tell me to stop! Obviously you liked it a lot!"

"No I was caught up in the moment!" , I lied. I fucking loved it, but I shouldn't. I have to trick myself that this isn't right.

"So you didn't like it!"

"No I didn't!"

"Your a fucking liar", she spat.

"Get out!"

She gathered her bag and as she walked out the door she called back "once you wanna grow a pair and face the fact that you like girls! Come talk to me".