The Thoughts That Weren't Suicidal

20 | No Better

"Hey Kris?" I asked when we stopped by her locker so that she could get her textbooks for her next class. 

"What's up Adri?" She isn't really paying attention, good.

"I'vegotatherapistappointmenttodayandIwaswonderingifyoucouldcomewithme."

If there is one thing that anybody can do to make someone not understand them, it's talk extremely fast. If you really want someone to not understand you, you can pretend to be me.

Kris glanced down at me and smirked. "I didn't understand a word that you just said Adri. You're going to have to tell me again, and slower."

I rolled my eyes and looked down at my feet. "Cole said that I could bring you to my therapist appointment, and I want you to come. So...do you want to come?"

I really hope that Kris says yes because if she doesn't then something bad is probably going to happen at therapy. Kristina may have taken all of my scissors (which I think is absolutely ridiculous), but I still have many pencils. You'd be amazed at the number of destructive things I can do with just two pencils.

I heard her locker closed, and then two arms had trapped me against the lockers.

"That sounds interesting. Are you sure you want me to come?" I wouldn't have asked if I didn't want you to come.

"Positive."

I made the mistake of looking up at her and saw that she was a lot closer than I thought she was. I would've liked for her to be even closer, and from the looks of it, Kris wanted that too because she was moving closer every second.

Everything that I said twenty minutes ago is irrelevant. I most definitely want yesterday to happen again and I have no doubts about it now. I think I want to kiss Kristina every minute for the rest of my life. 

"Well, then I'll be there." She spoke, and I could feel the fan of her breath against my lips. My breath hitched in excitement and my eyes slowly fell shut as I waited in anticipation for her lips to meet mine.

When her lips didn't meet mine and I instead was roughly pushed back against the lockers, and Kris lurched forward, I knew there was a problem.

I looked over Kris's shoulder to see Nathaniel's glare on the both of us. I could feel myself begin to shake, but Kris immediately composed herself and turned around to glare at him. When I saw Kris's forehead, my heart lurched a little. I didn't get a good look at it, but it seems that she cut her forehead on the lockers when Nathaniel pushed us into them. 

"What the hell is your problem?!" Kris yelled, pushing me behind her. Everyone who hadn't made it to class yet had now turned to face the little show we had begun to put on.

I don't do good in violent situations. Not because I'm weak and can't take care of myself; I have never lost a fight a day in my life. I just never know when to stop punching someone. I take blood as a sign of "keep going, you're almost there" instead of "stop, you're killing them". For instance, if Kris wasn't in front of me, Nathaniel probably wouldn't even have his hands right now.

"No one wants to see two dykes making out." He hissed, stepping closer to Kris.

Kris scoffed and stepped chest to chest with him. "I'll keep that in mind the next time I'm in bed with your girl."

I couldn't help but giggle at the comment, but when Nathaniel growled and raised his hand, my smile fell and I was stepping forward too. If he touches Kris then he definitely isn't going to have any hands.

"Everybody get to class!" A voice screeched from down the hallway and the crowd immediately started to dissipate. Nathaniel glared at Kris once more before turning around and leaving. I thought about stabbing him in the back as he walked off, but decided against it because I want to be the bigger person and being the bigger person is the better option.

A message brought to you by my anger management teacher.

Honestly, I still think that we should stab him. Oliver would be upset if we did that. We're going to listen to the creepy, 60-year-old anger management teacher who has 10 cats? Six cats, and yes because he gives us candy. Didn't your mother ever tell you not to take candy from strangers? Nope. That's why she's a bad mother.

"Kris." I called out gently. She hasn't turned around yet or moved; both sure signals that we probably aren't going to our class anytime soon. I technically could leave her behind since we don't have the same class next. I shouldn't though because if she just keeps standing there she's going to look really stupid. 

"Kris," I placed my hand on the small of her back, "Just ignore him and what happened so that we can-"

This time I didn't mind being slammed against the locker and I definitely didn't mind where her hands were going. This kiss was completely different from yesterday's. Yesterday it was slow and careful, but today it was fast and urgent.

It was like she was trying to tell me that everything was going to be okay. I didn't mind that; in fact, it's actually kind of cute. Except for the part where it feels like she's the one who needs to be told that.

Oh, how the tables have turned.

I frowned at her when she eventually pulled away from the kiss and she just smirked before pecking my lips one last time.

"Guess I was wrong yesterday." She teased, speaking against my lips.

I rolled my eyes and nodded. "Obviously, now don't be a tease," I whispered, tilting my lips towards her.

She laughed quietly and pulled her face away from mine.

"Later. I'll pick you up from school." She whispered and gave me one more kiss before fully pulling away and looking me over. Her face hardened as she stroked my cheek with the back of her hand.

"If he tries anything else with you today, you call me and you defend yourself. Don't kill him, but," Kris paused, exhaling an angry breath. "Just make sure and call me, okay?"

"Kris-" I started, both worried and confused, but she cut me off with a hard glare. 

"You'll call me Adrianna. Understand?" Kris repeated, holding me close.

I nodded, because the use of my full name left me no choice. Kris mirrored the movement, and placed a long kiss to my forehead and backing away, heading towards the exit of the school.

I stood there dazed for a few moments before I got off of the lockers and stared at Kris's retreating back.

"Kris where are you going?!" I yelled down the hallway. I don't understand what she thinks she's doing. What makes her think that she can just walk away from me like that? I am confused, horny and scared all at the same time, and it is not a fun mix. I need some type of explanation.

"Go to class Adri." She yelled back, and that was the last thing that she said before the exit doors closed behind her.

I stood there in shock for a few moments, letting it settle in that Kristina Taylor just walked away from me, before screaming in frustration and punching her locker with all of the force that I wanted to direct towards Nathaniel's face earlier. 

When I see Kristina again, I am going to kill her. It will most likely be a slow and painful death because that is what she will deserve after walking away from me after a very stressful situation. It's like she's running away from her problems instead of facing them which is very rude of her because I'm supposed to be the one who runs away from her problems instead of facing them in this friendship. So now not only has Kristina abandoned me, she's stolen my spotlight. 

I am most definitely going to kill Kristina Taylor. 

What happened to listening to Oliver and being the bigger person? Oliver can go die too.