On a String

Chapter 13

But Kai didn't fight- or live- like that now. The sword might be shorter than the scythe, but Kai was definitely more distant than Cole.

However, Cole was certain that was the result of how fighting affected him mentally. Where Cole had an open mind and an open fighting style, Kai's mind was a tangle of ghostly shadows- mixtures of ideas that didn't (shouldn't) go together, but had somehow been knotted into a giant, tangled mess.

Kai didn't (couldn't) fight with passion any more. No one has the emotional capacity to be reckless when they're that broken inside.

It was hard to admit that limits like that existed. The mind can only take so much and Cole's own breaking had been proof of that. Just because they were Ninja didn't mean they were all powerful- or unbreakable.

He was starting to see that he couldn't fight Kai's problems head on with willpower alone, in the same way that you can't undo knots in a steel cable by simply pushing against them. Rather, you had to look deeper and go down into the depths of each knot - figure out where it started and untangle it from there. The webs in Kai's mind were made of mis-associations (like team and pain)... lies... so only truth would be able to destroy them.

Team and pain.

Fire and pain.

Disobedience and harsh punishment. (Punishment and pain)

Orders and powerlessness. (Powerlessness and pain)

Fighting and killing.

Cole certainly had his work cut out for him.

Beside him, Kai began to shift, pulling out of the embrace. Cole was relieved to see that he didn't look as worried or as cold as he had been, although he was still a long way away from being like the 'old' Kai.

"Kai?"

"Yeah?"

Cole tried to hide a small grin. 'Yeah?' when was the last time Kai had sounded so causal? "I think our drinks might have gone cold,"

Kai raised one eyebrow slightly and looked at the two cups sitting on the bench. "You might be right," he nodded. "That's okay. I'm not thirsty anyway,"

"Neither am I," Cole shrugged. "Look, Kai, I think we need to talk. Does the lounge sound like an okay place for you?"

Kai looked down. "Okay," tension began to creep into his voice again.

Creeping, sneaking... Like whispery puppets moving through the night-

Cole gave a reassuring smile. "You're not in trouble. There's just some stuff that needs to be sorted out," he explained lightly as they left the kitchen.

They sat on the same couch they had earlier that night.

Taking a breath (breathe again) Cole began. "So, Kai, what bothers you about being in a team?"

Kai's eyes narrowed "Sorry?" the polite tone he used warned Cole that he was very close to bringing this conversation up short and leaving ideas of trust and open communication in the dust.

"You seem to find it hard to trust us," Cole clarified, careful to keep his own tone open and warm. "What is it about trust that worries you?"

That seemed to catch the Ninja in red off guard. Kai's eyes widened a fraction- a movement Cole wouldn't have been able to see had they not been sitting so close together.

"I never said I didn't trust you," Kai said cautiously, stopping when Cole held up a hand.

"This isn't just about trusting me. It's about the whole team. Why display such a blank front to them? Does knowing that someone knows how you're feeling make you uncomfortable?"