Handle With Care

Shards of Stone and Hot Chocolate

I could tell that they were happy just having each other, too. I could hear them all downstairs right now, either laughing or just talking about simple things, the gentle vibrations of their voices thrumming against the walls of the house. I was sure they had no one else but themselves to worry about. And that was but one reason why I had to leave; I couldn't risk taking that carefree lifestyle away from them just because they thought they were helping me. Part of me was sure they wouldn't care anyway, if I left. I couldn't imagine anyone wanting me for company, and after having met me, I was sure they had rathered never found me, as well.

I felt as though I had taken away many other people's happiness just because I had gotten in the way. When you're a rogue, it's quite truly a dog-eat-dog world out there. You had to fight if you wanted to survive. I've killed more rogues than I could count just because my wolf instincts kicked in, the anger of my loss getting the better of me. But, in the end, when my pale fur was bloodied and mangled, and my muscles ached from scratches or bites, I would always remorse in my actions. There was always someone I ended up taking from someone else's life. Whether it be a mother, a father, a brother, a sister, a son or even a daughter, I had taken one of those from some other family out there. From what I could imagine, possibly the same way my family had been taken from me.

I shuddered. Gruesome images of my family members' disemboweled bodies, hardly recognizable, flashed through my head. Swallowing thickly, I tried to will the images away by focusing my attention on the snow outside, a lingering shiver of discomfort coursing throughout my body.

I distracted myself by watching small little flurries of snowflakes fall gracefully onto anything they could stick to. I tilted my head a bit as I imagined the flakes' movements resembling a sort of dance, their routine ending once they came to rest with the others. Yes, this was a good distraction.

I sighed, wishing my life was as simple as a snowflake's. I guess, in a way, it was, but certainly snowflakes didn't have nightmares or a long lasting feeling of depression eating away at their soul.

Deciding to watch the snow as I waited, I lifted myself up onto the wide windowsill and situated myself so I was sitting. Being careful of my back, I leaned against the frame, and placed my bare feet on the other end. I huddled my arms close to my chest, suppressing another shiver at the slightly cold gushes of air coming from the edges of the window.

"We just have to wait, now..." I whispered to no one in particular. I sighed, tilting my head to rest my forehead against the window, proceeding to watch the soft flurries of white fall from the sky. While doing so, I held the stone shards in my hand again as a way to grasp some much needed reassurance. My fingers slid over the jagged pieces with tender care, their rough crevices gliding under my fingertips. The snow outside was peaceful, and gentle, with hardly a care in the world.

* * *

My heart pounded painfully in my chest, flooding my ears with its thick and rapid pulsing. It felt impossible to breathe, and at the sight before me, I thought I'd never be able to again.

My father's head, ripped off at the neck and eyes wide along with an open mouth, was lying by the front door, and his body laid only a few feet away. His chest had been ripped open, and his entrails were strewn around him. Sickly splatters of blood covered nearly every space on the floor and walls.

"P-Papa...?" I croaked, a sickening feeling overtaking my stomach, a feeling of something rising up my esophagus and simmering threateningly at the back of my throat, ready to overflow. The muscles in my legs instantly grew weak, and as I tried to crouch down, my knees buckled, landing with a noiseless thud on the wooden floor. My heart hammered away in my chest as I reached out with trembling hands, sliding my fingers through the strands of my father's raven black hair to pick his roughly-severed head up off the floor.