Mated by Chance

The Cold Shoulder

"Are you feeling any better?" I looked up at Roman, who was watching me with a worried expression. I sighed and sat up nodding.

"I'm fine." I said standing. "I'm hungry." I admitted walking toward the door he had just come through.

I felt his hand on my upper arm with a grip strong enough to let me know he was holding me, yet gentle enough for me to pull away from him, I didn't. I turned to face him.

"Talk to me." he said hoarsely. I frowned as I stared at him while I thought about how soon I had let myself get attached to him. I felt something for him. It wasn't like...it was stronger than that, but I couldn't put my finger on him. I opened my mouth but closed it when I realized I couldn't. I couldn't talk to him.

"I'm fine." I lied while giving him the most convincing smile I could muster and I pulled out of his grip. Everyone fell for it, I could be dying inside but one smile like this and everyone could believe I had won the lottery. Roman wasn't everyone else though. Roman was different.

His look wasn't understanding or convinced. It was strong and hard, but his feelings were hurt. He let his arm drop to his side and he turned out of the door without a single word. I felt empty.

I sighed and closed the door softly before I turned to the bed and laid down in a huff. I turned to look out of the grand window. I let out a breath, and another one, and another one until I felt like I couldn't catch my own. I gasped and gasped and gasped until all that would come out my body were sobs.

I was pathetic.

***

"Open up." I ignored his voice on the other side of the door. I leaned my head against the frame and closed my eyes. "Open the door Kara."

"I do not want to talk." I said between clenched teeth.

"Move from in front of the door." he ordered.

I didn't budge. "No."

"I will break it off the hinges." he swore. I rolled my eyes at him.

"Please just go away." I sat there and when I didn't hear him again I relaxed on the door. Suddenly a huge force hit the door making me jump back furiously. I scrambled to my feet and stood back and soon enough again he hit the door with enough force to knock it off the hinges. I stared at him incredulously.

"What is wrong with you?" I accused.

"Me?" he yelled at me making me flinch. I bit my lip at him change in tone. "What did I do? What did I do to make you pull yourself back like that? You don't even want to look at me anymore?"

"It's not you"-

"It's not me? It's not me?" he demanded crossing his arms over his broad chest. I stared at him for a second before his eyes caught my own and I look away.

"No. It isn't. It's me." I admitted truthfully.

"What? What about you?"

"It's nothing." I said dismissively.

"You're lying! You're lying to me like I'm some punk kid out there. I'm supposed to your mate!" he demanded growing angrier. He looked so angry I was surprised he hadn't shifted yet. I looked away feeling my self pity and regret from what I did to Cali return. I wasn't this person. I wasn't used to letting myself be happy. I was used to every thing backfiring.

"Kara, let me in"-

"Please. Get out." I said blinking away the tears. I don't want to see you, or talk to you. I want to think. I want to be alone." I said looking him in the eyes. Hurt flashed his eyes and I instantly reached my hand out to touch him but he stepped away and went toward the destroyed door and stepped over it before turning back to me and shaking his head.

"I'm sorry." I whispered quietly to myself.

I spent the next hour sitting in the middle of the floor staring at the wall. I felt like a ghost. I didn't recognize myself. I felt I had so many people to make happy here. When I was away I was free, now here everything I do affects someone and it's turning out to be in the negative. I was so selfless and happy away and now I'm sad and I feel selfish. I hate it. I need to leave. I need to go.

I stood frantic and grabbed my jacket before I ran out the hallway and started descending the stairs. I saw my car keys on the hook in the kitchen, next to the fridge and snatched them down, not making eye contact with any of the people in the common room. I darted out of the house and into the parking lot running to my car and driving off quickly. I know I was known for running, but I couldn't help it. This was not home. This place...this used to be for me. Not anymore.