being cheated on (moving on)

the first and second time I seen you since

the first time i seen you after the breakup was at night. i was at the fair with my friend and it was late and i was ready for bed. as i sat on the bench i felt someone staring at me. i looked over and there you were. we both froze and my heart started to feel like an inferno. we stared at each other for what felt 10 years but was only 5 seconds before you took off. maybe you thought i was someone who would cause a scene, but i'd never do that to you. i went to go buy a tea and across the window i saw you holding her and you looked straight at me but i pretended that i didn't see you. you stayed there for a long time and then left and so did i.  except not only did you leave with her but you left with my heart. (corny) the second time i saw you, it was a month later. it was a football game at my school. your school vs mine. i was talking to an older friend of mine when i heard multiple feet stomping. i turned around at the wrong time because you were only half a foot away from me before you ran out on to the field. even though you played sidelines the whole game, i was still proud of you for just being there even though i said i never wanted to see you again. what i meant was i never want to see you with another. i'll love you for as long as i can before someone else makes me fall in love with them. *possibly the hardest sentence i have ever had to type through out this tiny shit diary*
Just know you don't mean shit to me and that this entire "book" isn't for you. It's for me to remind myself that you are nothing to me. I thought I loved you but I loved the thought of someone loving me. There was never a spark, there was never happiness. I found who I love and it's certainly not you.