Now Send Me A Way Out

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I couldn't believe how badly I messed up. I couldn't believe how I lost Brandon. I couldn't believe that I let Emma ruin everything.

After several agonizing minutes wallowing in my tears, I remembered that I was on the floor of a restaurant with many people probably staring at me. I looked up out of my hands and confirmed what I thought. Nearly every person in the surrounding tables were staring at me or giving awkward looks in my direction. I quickly stood up, wiped the tears off my face, and ran straight out the door. I didn't look back as I went inside my car, and started it. I had no idea where to go, but I knew I needed to get out of this living reminder of the past hour that replayed and replayed in my tortured head.

I decided to go back home, and try and call Brandon. I called several times, but he didn't answer, and I knew he was still hurting from my fiery comments that burned his heart. I wished I had more self-control, and that I could take back all the things I said that pained him. I loved him so much, and I only wanted him back in my life again.

After leaving him apologetic voicemails and texts I left him alone. He seemed to not want me anymore, and that hurt me the most. My mind wandered, and I couldn't help but think about why he left so suddenly. Was I a quick thing to him? Just another pretty girl for him to woo and then flee on his tour bus? I wondered how many other girls he 'fell in love' with, and subsequently left out high and dry. Maybe this was a game to him, see how many girls he could win over in one tour, and all his band mates were playing it too. These thoughts sickened me, and I didn't want to believe any of it. But the more I thought about it, the more it seemed right. I've only known him for two days, and to think that this was all it took to woo me over seemed a little suspicious. I'm usually a reserved person, not one to jump into relationships so easily. But something about Brandon was just so different, distinct, and dreamy that I could not put my finger on it. He was like a warm day on LA, but in romance he was like a passionate summer night. I wanted to get to know more about that side, and this feeling sunk me deeper in melancholy.

I got out of my bed and walked towards my living room. I turned on the TV and aimlessly stared at it until I received a buzz in my phone. I grabbed it, and saw that it was my boss wondering if I could come in early tomorrow to do some extra work. I worked as a secretary in an insurance company, not the most colorful job in the world, unlike Brandon's, but it paid the bills. I responded with a yes, and tossed my phone across the couch. I resumed my mindless watching, and then heard another buzz. I assumed it was just another text from my boss, so I grabbed it and automatically began typing an ok. I glance up at the actual text, however, and when I saw that the sender was Brandon my eyes widened. I read the text that he sent:

Hey, I heard ur voicemails. Want 2 talk?

I smiled at his use of outdated acronyms and quickly replied;

Yes, I would love that. On the phone?

He answered:

Sure.

Seconds later an incoming call came sent from Brandon. I answered it and greeted with a sober, "Hey."

"Hey," was all that he said. I longed for his heartwarming usual self, but given the circumstances I didn't know when that would return.

"Look, I'm really sorry about earlier-"

"No, it's fine. I'm over it. Listen, I have about two weeks off, till the end of the year I guess, until I return to tour. Wanna maybe hangout sometime before then?"

A grin quickly formed across my face. "Yeah, that would be awesome. How about Saturday?"

I could feel the smile through his voice. "Okay, awesome!" he giggled.

I laughed and said, "Well, where do you want to go?" 

"You live here, I assume you know all the cool spots." That was true, growing up in the city of angels you tend to discover its shinier, less-known sides.

"Okay then, tourist, would you like me to bring a tour bus with me?"

"Only if you're in a tight little uniform." He snarked back.

"Wipe that smile off your face, Brando. I can feel your ego from here."

"Okay Jules, whatever you say."

"It is whatever I say, that's the way it's going to be."

"I know," He lovingly acknowledged. This man was more than I could ever imagine.

"Great, so I'll see you soon," I said.

"Yeah, sure."

"Okay then, bye..." I began to hang up.

"Wait, one more thing." He suddenly blurt out.

"Uh, yes?" I asked, a little suspiciously.

"Can I bring my girlfriend along with me?"

Literal shock froze up my body. I couldn't hear, speak, or think. If Brandon was here he would have been shocked by the face I was making right now.

"W-what? Girlfriend?" My voice raged through the phone.

"Yeah, girlfriend." He was unnaturally calm, and I could tell he had reservations too.

"W-who?" Was all that I could mutter, my entire body was shaking.

It was a couple seconds until he softly whispered, as if knowing my reaction, "Emma."

I hung up on him as soon as I heard that. I was shaking so hard I ran to my cabinet to grab some liquor. I usually didn't drink unless it was an emergency, and after hearing that I could have drank the whole bottle. My phone began buzzing again, another call from Brandon, but I ignored him and continued drinking. How could he hurt me like this? Was this also part of his game, to hook up with best friend and seal the deal? I felt myself getting sick, and ran into the bathroom and vomited. This was worse than what happened earlier, and I felt like a thousand swords were stabbing me everywhere. Heartache came from my stomach and exited my mouth into the toilet, and I hated Brandon.

My phone was going off like crazy, with calls and texts from Brandon begging me to call him back, to "explain." What was there to explain? He messed with my heart and now he was going to mess with hers too. I shut off my phone and ran into my bedroom. I closed all the blinds, blasted out some music, and tried to shut out the world that was crashing down on me.

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