It Doesn't Change A Thing.. ( 1D ) Editing

don't make me regret it

I'm feeling rather creative today , so I Update again. this time I'm a little more chilled , so I hope you enjoy :) if not , tell me what to change and how to make it better . If you like it , please vote !! :)

- Pia xx

I was sitting in front of Niall and waited for him to begin . He had been looking out of my window and was frowning . As he turned towards me , his face was pale . I quickly got up and rushed over to him , taking his icy face in my burning hands . he flinched at the touch , but remained still.

' Niall , you don't have t- '

he interrupted me

' But I need to , it's - I don't - ' he rubbed his hands over mine , in an attempt to cool them down a little , which didn't work because his hands were getting warm from the small touch of mine . He was starting to worry me , so I let my right hand slide down his shoulder and his arm , till I took his hand in mine and pulled him onto my bed . He relucantly sat down and took a deep breath . Then he looked at me with a small smile , showing me that he was okay now .

When I pulled my hand away , he grabbed it and puled me towards him again . I leaned my head onto his shoulder and asked ' Why'd you do that ? ' He smiled a shyly and said ' I - I don't know , it helps to keep calm. But if you're not okay with it I can ju- ' I placed my other hand over his mouth and said sternly ' Just try to calm down , I won't judge you . I'm here for you . I don't think you realize , how great of a friend you are . I have only known you for what ? Almost two month ? And you have helped me so much already . Do you know how long it had been since I smiled the last real smile ? No , but it was a long time and I feel good for the first time in years . But I think it is unfair , that you do so much for me and I haven't given anything back to you yet. So just let me be there for you , like you are here for me okay ? ' He nodded and smiled as I removed my hand and pulled the other one , that was entwined with his into my lap , started to play with his fingers .

' It started with my auditions for the X-factor . I got quite a lot of hate and like , I don't know what I have done , but people seemed to dislike me more than the rest of the boys . Since last summer it almost stopped completely . But then - '

He choked and looked down , his face contorded in pain . I quickly took his other hand too and shifted on the bed , bringing myself in front of Niall , my back towards him , our arms wrapped around me , laying in my lap .

' Then , - It got worse than ever . I got death threats every day and somebody threw a stone threw the windows of my moms house . They wanted me to kill myself , I - I don't know what I have done , but they just hate me . As I got the second letter , I was fucking scared . They wrote that they would harm my mother if I didn't co-operated with them . I refused to let them do anything to my family , so I told Simon about this . He got the police on this and they tracked the people down who did it . They admitted it and are in jail currently .The worst thing is , that mom treats me different . She always keeps her distance to me , only hugs me when we're in the house .She barely calls me or answers when I call her . I think she hates me for what I make her go through .As the guys were guided out one of them was left alone with me for I don't know , less than a minute . He looked me in the eyes and told me that I wasn't worth it to live , that my family would be much better without me . I believed him . This night I started to cut . '

Faster than a lightning, I spun around to him, with tears in my eyes m threatening to spill over . ' Are you still - do you still hurt yourself ? '

he slowly nodded and lowered his gaze , feeling judged . I sighed , knowing the feeling too well and said ' It was just a question , I'm not judging . Go on please '