God should have given us a countdown clock. Wouldn't it be nice to plan things out so you can save the worst possible moments for the very end?
"Hell, I can't justify paying this electric bill this month. They'll shut me off in 60 days and my clock says I'll only live another 62 days. I'll rough it those last two and spend the money throwing a kegger tonight!"
Knowing the date, but not necessarily knowing the method would still leave a little surprise to it, but you could still get time to not only figure out what your last words should be, but you can practice saying them so they come out sounding right in those final seconds. When most people die, I imagine their last words being along the lines of "oh shit" or "what the fuck?". I've said for years, I'd want my final words to be something along the lines of Vigo The Carpathian's final words before his execution - "death is but a doorway, time but a window. I'll be back." Sounds a bit like a confident promise, and maybe it'll let me come back through a painting and possess someone in order to live again. A guy can dream, right? Knowing me though, my final words would likely be along the lines of "When gone, am I, the last of the Jedi, you will be..." Yeah, that's definitely me.
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Deep Thoughts with Andrew Johann Datoush
HumorA collection of random thoughts I've dedicated time putting pen to paper, or tapping my phone screen to send to social media.
