Struggle!

Chapter 1

“The soft green meadow…

A wind in the trees…

The rain of happiness…

Makes this moment freeze…”

The old song kept ringing in my head endlessly… replaying the horrors from my past. Frozen to the bones, feet numb with the clinging frost growing high, I snapped my eyes shut. The voice worsened. 

Maddened by the cold perhaps, I doubled up in a fetal position and started screaming. No … I wasn’t afraid of being heard. Because there was no one around who would come running to put an arm around my shoulders to ease out my cries of terror … of incoherent dread. I tuned off the melody though… the screaming helped. 

I could only hear eons of silence echoing back as I voiced out my lungs at the crowd of trees enveloping me. I stopped. My throat was hoarse, my eyes were burning but my ears were now redundant. Perfect. 

I gathered myself from the mossy ground staggering to the nearby pond. Splashing cold water on my face left my eyes ablaze. I needed sleep. I needed food. I needed someone … anyone. 

Homeless. Again, the word left a clanging boom in my head. Painful to hear. And about time, I let myself fall to the ground in a heap, and succumbed to tears. Why me? Why us? As I sat motionlessly in the tall grass, tears made their way across my cheeks and down onto my lap. I forgot to rein my thoughts and soon the flashes of some familiar faces smiled at me.

Jess. Clove. Peter. Kevin. And May. Her eyes were hauntingly accusing, grating my heart against my ribs painfully. I knew it was my fault. I had lost my best friends and my sister just because of my silly bet. What did I bet for? I racked my brains to remember. Did I bet for their lives? Yes, maybe. I was ruthless enough. 

No … I would never do that. I loved them all dearly. They were the only ones I had. My family! I would never sell them to death! But my mistake did, it sold them all into the hands of wild, savage death.

I gathered myself and pushed myself into standing. Ignoring the wobbly feeling that was pinching each and every inch of my legs, I started walking deeper into the cluster of trees. Holding onto trees for support, I had set my mind onto NOT giving up! 

No. I wasn’t a quitter! I will find my friends … or at least, my breath hitched in my throat as I thought of the second option, their remains.  I couldn’t give up on them. They were my life … my new life!

A fresh wave of dread swept over me as I realized that I had finally settled into a home. With people I loved. My sister. My friends. Hannah. 

My heart constricted. What was I going to tell her? IF I ever got to tell her something, what would it be? Will she ever be able to forgive me for what I did to her family? I wasn’t so sure. Will I ever be able to live in the home I had recently found and loved so much? 

“Be careful, Alene”, Hannah held my hand in her soft plump hands pecking me lightly on my forehead as I waited for Peter to bring my camp bags downstairs. “I know you’ll take care of others. I trust you and I am going to miss all the racket you guys make! Come home soon hon!”

This was the last time I had seen her. Before we came here to meet this terrible, terrible fate. 

 I gulped but somehow it made me feel worse. The small ball of guilt and remorse was stuck in my throat as it trapped my breath inside. How could I have let Hannah down? She took me in when no one else would even look at me! And I destroyed her family. 

I had been homeless, thwarted and disowned by my other family. I remembered the day when I had been thrown out of my home. 

My heart sped as memories flashed through my mind. My dad, I shuddered at his image, pushing me towards the door. An evil glint in his eyes, a malicious smile accessorized his face as he punished me for standing up for myself, punished me for telling on him.

Each image that flashed through my mind felt like a cold knife being plunged into my already wounded heart. My nails were cutting through my skin as I clenched my fists tightly trying to squeeze the images shut.

“The soft green meadow…

A wind in the trees…

The rain of happiness…

Makes this moment freeze…”

The song replayed itself in my mind. I rocked back and forth trying to tune it out.

I closed my eyes and heard someone scream. It was a girl! A young girl! “ALENE!!!” I heard her shout. My neck snapped as I turned quickly towards the sound. Was it coming from the East? I started running towards the source. “ALENE... ALENE… HELP ME!” 

The screams got worse and I ran around desperately wanting to the save the girl. She seemed to be in pain. I cringed as another scream shattered the heavy silence echoing in my ears long after it had ended. “ALENE! HELP ME, I’M … “ Silence. I halted, trembling from head to toe. 

I strained my ears so as to hear that voice again, but nothing. I stood hugging a tree trying to draw some air inside me. Who was that? It sounded so familiar. So … May like. It seemed like suddenly all the remaining air had been flushed out of me as the familiarity of the screams struck me! Was she alive? How could that be? I saw her … dead! Lifeless! 

Another scream hit the stagnant air like a gunshot. “ALENE!” I made to run forward but soon caught myself. The girl seemed to have moved from my East to the West. I doubled back as I started calling back “MAY! WHERE ARE YOU? MAAAAYY” I felt my knees buckle but I refused to give up. I would not lose May again. I had to save her. 

Again, the screaming stopped. I staggered to the ground unable to run anymore. It felt like the shouts were beckoning me towards May but as soon as they stopped I was left helpless again. I didn’t have clue to what I was doing. 

I loud growl made me jump to my feet. My legs faltered unable to hold my body up and I hit the mossy ground again. I looked up to see the sky threatening to burst. 

Just as the sky menaced loudly again, a fresh bout of screams caused the hair on my back to stand. This time, I sat rooted to the ground as heavy droplets of water pelted down on my face from the openings in the sky. 

I lost count of the minutes, maybe hours which had passed as I sat frozen listening to the shrieking. I could sense the change in direction of the source after every few screams. Chilled to the bone, I could hear my blood pounding in my head as I continued to ignore the shudders running down my spine with each fresh wave of cries ablaze in pain and fear.

Nausea surged through by body and I slumped onto the ground on my back. Feeling something jab into my ribs I bolted up straight, cradling my small backpack, which I had completely forgotten, into my lap.

The rain was beating me senseless. I kept staring at my backpack until a sudden urge to zip it open made me tear my eyes off it. I rummaged through the sack in hope of finding my water bottle. My fingers clasped around something small. 

I pulled my hand out and held out my palm in front of my eyes to see what I found. I found four small, colorful beads resting onto the curves of my palms. My breathing hitched. This is all where this started. This is why I was here in this state.

AN: Hope you enjoyed reading it! I will update soon. The picture on the side is of sweet May. Please Vote and comment! :)