It's Just Ann

Chapter 27 - Rejection

I don't know whom I was trying to fool. Even if we are the closest friends, Gareth has made his mind long ago and why would he change that for me? Who am I to believe I can change his priorities or anything? I shouldn't be that conceited, I'm just a girl, naive and inexperienced. I'm no one special as to dare dream he would make an exception for me and like me back if I tried to get his attention. I should've been satisfied with his friendship, but I got greedy. That was my mistake.

Even for five minutes? —Gareth

My heart flutters when I read his text, a little smile coming to my lips. But I shake my head and stop my self from harbouring hopes. I can't misread what he's doing because then the disappointment will be crushing and I don't have any intention to feel like that. If I don't expect anything then I don't have a reason to be disappointed, right?

I really wanna see you. I don't like anyone else here. I don't even know why I came —Gareth

My heart twist in my chest and I have to bite my lips together. Even if it sounds like a whine and nothing but complains, it's hard not to read something else between those lines. But I can't allow myself to find another meaning. I have to be literal or I'll keep making mistakes. I don't want him to dislike me.

Because I don't know how to reply, I block my mobile and shove it back in my purse. I keep waiting for Cece and push back all thoughts about Gareth and his messages. I don't even think how he probably knows I read the message but haven't replied.

"Cece, hurry up!" I mumble between gritted teeth, looking around for my friend to beg him to leave. And if he doesn't want to, then I'll just say goodbye and leave this party on my own. I'll call Aaron to pick me up or something, even I told my mum before that I would stay at Cece's place so she didn't have to wait for me or worry.

"Ann!" someone calls and I turn hoping to find Cece, ready to beg to leave, but instead I find Gareth. "I found you." He smiles broadly, more than usual, and I would smile back at him if it weren't for the fact all colour has drained my face and even my heart has skipped a beat in surprise.

"I'm just waiting for Cece. We'll be leaving now," I say, although it sounds hesitant. "You didn't have to bother."

"I know, but I realised that if you leave I have no other reason to stay. I don't even talk to any of the people here but you and Cece," he explains, shrugging.

I think he's a bit tipsy. I notice his accent changes, becoming a bit thicker. He normally speaks with a conventional pronunciation, clear so everyone can understand him, but he's left that behind and he sounds a lot more casual now, his cockney accent thick and heavy.

"Do you need us to drop you?" I ask. Maybe that's what he needs, maybe he just wants to go home.

He shrugs before he sits next to me. He rests his elbow on the bar and holds his face on his fist, looking at me carefully. "You look pretty," he says, surprising me. "You always look pretty, though."

I blush, I know it. I can feel my cheeks heating and my heart racing. I'm so flustered that I don't even know what to say, and when he gives me a lazy smile my breath gets caught in my throat.

My eyes dart away, looking desperately for Cece.

"I think I drank more than I should've... or that cocktail was stronger than I thought," he muses as I keep looking for Cece. "I'm saying things I shouldn't. Ann, I don't want to give you hopes."

I look at him again, my heart sinking this time. Even if I was fighting against it, it seems my heart was rebelling and it still built up castles of hopes. His eyes now are a bit sad, sympathetic and I don't need help to understand why.

He's rejecting me... again, even if I haven't confessed.

"I know," I breathe out. I doubt he can hear me above the music, but he can read my lips. My eyes are burning, welling up with tears and he can see them. He tenses and his expression shows worry. "I know and I'll take care of it. Don't worry."

I look away one more time and finally spot Cece coming back. Even from afar he notices my expression, the desperation I'm feeling to leave this place as soon as possible. Without saying a word he understands and when he joins me, his arm wraps protectively around me.

"We're leaving," he tells Gareth after giving him a greeting nod. "See you on set tomorrow."

I can't utter another word, I just bow my head and let Cece lead me outside, leaving Gareth inside, with a worried expression.

This was really a big mistake.

>>>·<<<

Poor Ann :( she keeps being rejected and she hasn't even confessed. But well, if you read the bonus content from Gareth's POV (I said at the beginning where to find it) you know why he's doing it.

Fan Art made by the wonderful Charlotte (MacKeown)!

Dedication to brokenfuturehearts 

Bel, xx

NU: Friday