Summer 2015, begin of July
Tired, sweating and with pudding like legs I locked the front door open.
God, this weather's killing me...
And the fact that I have to walk around for four hours basically nonstop (I work as a waitress) two times a day doesn't make it a tad better...
I checked the time: 11.00 PM
ugh.
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"RAMONA ELIZABETH HUDSON!" I heard my step mum Susan yelling as soon as I stepped out of the shower.
God, what have I done wrong again?!
sigh
"I told you to iron your blouses for your work!" she started bitching at me.
"Yeaaaah? And what yet...?" I yelled back.
Is she fucking serious?? I'm almost 18 years old, I can decide on my own very well when and how I iron my goddamn clothes, and even if I do it in the morning before work!
Fuck's sake
She continued her yelling and complaining for a little time, then it was suddenly silent and I dared too get out of the bathroom and into my room.
I put "Ramones Mania" into my CD-player, threw myself on my bed and just laid there for god knows how long.
Suddenly, my view fell on the picture of my mum, Elizabeth, which was standing on my nightstand.
She looked so happy, looking into the camera with her shining blue eyes, her friendly smile and long, dark brown hair falling over her shoulders 'till down her waist, holding the 1 year old version of me in her arms.
People often say that I look totally like her, but when I look into the mirror I can't see a bit of the beauty she was...
A little bit shakingly, I took the photo and looked at it while a tear was rolling down my cheek. I miss her so much...
I didn't get to know her very well tho, she died in a car accident when I was at the age of 5.
But since I can think, she was always there for me...
If I was sad or so, she'd cheer me up, if I get hurt she'd make it feel less painful, if I had any problems (kindergarten problems tho, but still) she'd help me find a solution... and she's always supported me, whatever I wanted to do...
She also introduced me into Rock n' Roll since I was a baby, probably even before I was born.
And she saw them all.
Guns N' Roses, Mötley Crüe, Nirvana, Hanoi Rocks, The Rolling Stones, Metallica, Skid Row, Iron Maiden... and countless other bands.
Also was she a huge fan of the Ramones, that's where I got my first name from.
Normally, listening to the Ramones always makes me feel better, but this time it was different. It just woke so many feelings inside of me, beginning with the fact that I was born into the wrong generation, ending with the missing of my mother.
Now I really had begun to bawl, and I cried myself to sleep with 'Needles and Pins'.
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The next day was my free day, so I decided to go outside some time to escape that hell hole.
I threw on a Led Zeppelin shirt, black shorts, put a bandana into my hair and eventually used a little bit much hairspray.
But my plans should be destroyed quicker than I could say "Jonesy"
As soon as I grabbed the doorknob, my 8 year old half brother Jake appeared and started to go on my nerves with pulling on my clothes and asking questions over questions.
Why I wear a padlock chain around my neck, where I'm going to go to, why I'm wearing chucks in that weather, why I did my hair etc etc...
He always did that.
Going on my nerves till....
"MOOOOOOM! Ramona is mean to me!" he started to whine after I told him to shut the fuck up.
Little bastard.
"Ramona! Watch your mouth!" Susan stormed into the hallway.
"Don't tell me what to do, you ain't even my mother!" I yelled back.
"Into your room. Now. You won't leave the house the whole week, except for work!"
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Great. Here I am now. Basically caught into my own room.
Such things happen like every other day man...
Why the hell does Susan always make such a drama out of nothing? Who does she even think she is?
But I really wanted to go, I couldn't take it anymore.
I made sure that my door's locked and chuckled quietly.
"ha, you can't keep me in here, bitch" I whispered and opened the window.
