Chapter 2: Troubled Memoirs

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"Fine, but if he calls me Sunshine one more time, I refuse to be held responsible for my actions." I said darkly, pulling out a knife from where I'd stuffed it down my boot.

"I'll behave if she does." Murphy drawled, a lazy look plastered onto his face.

"So what's been going on?" I asked, as we started walking again, falling into pace beside Octavia.

"We found the dropship, commandeered by Kane and Abby." Finn informed me, he seemed tense, unlike his laid back self.

"Woah, woah, woah." I said, holding up my hands in confusion as I abruptly stopped walking. "They came down?"

"Yeah." Bellamy said, and I saw him continue to look around for any signs of danger.

"Well who else was there?" I asked desperately, "did you see a small kid? Looks about twelve, dark skin, brown eyes?"

Bellamy looked at me quizzically, "doesn't ring any bells, sorry."

"But there were kids, right?"

"Mostly soldiers." Murphy answered, "but yeah. There were some families, kids, normal people."

"Okay." I breathed, reassured, beginning to walk again. He could still be alive.

"Hey wait up, why are you looking for a kid?" Octavia asked, grabbing my arm.

"Please don't tell me you have a secret kid." Murphy said, sarcasm bleeding from his tone.

I shot a wary glance at the two girls I didn't really recognize, before rolling my eyes at Murphy.

"Don't be an idiot Murphy, I said he was like, twelve. That would have made me five when he was born." I retorted with an unladylike snort.

"So why are you so interested in this kid?" Bellamy had his typical frown on his face, but I found it irritating this time around.

If I was blurting this secret out, there was no way I was doing in front of anyone I had trust issues with. So basically I would only spit it out to the two Blakes.
Not that I had anything against Finn, but I hardly knew the guy compared to Octavia and Bellamy and I just didn't need the extra judgement.

"You really wanna do this right here, right now?" I said testily, gesturing to our surroundings.

Bellamy looked hesitant before a look of complete defiance came over his face. "Yeah, I do."

"You just have to argue with me about everything, don't you?" I sighed, "fine. Finn, how 'bout you take the sobbing girl, Monroe and Grumpy the dwarf over there to examine some tree bark?"

Finn looked bewildered for a moment before grabbing Murphy and the two girls and pulling them away.
I plastered a smile onto my face and turned back to the two Blakes.

"So, the kid." I said, "his name's Kabe."

Bellamy face screwed up in thought before he looked up at me, "I know that name. Wasn't he the kid who-"

"-the kid who was accused of a hit and run Ark style and chased after by law before crash landing into me and getting away in style? Why yes, he would be that kid." I said with a nod.

"You hid him?" Octavia asked, looking slightly stunned bless her, like I was such an innocent doe.

I let out a bitter sounding laugh, "of course I hid him. That kid is like the brother I never wanted, smart, adorable and vulnerable. My responsibility. He did nothing wrong."

"They said he was the one who killed those people at first..." Bellamy mused, "but that was you in the end." His eyes widened, "you got locked up for him?"

My defenses immediately flew up, "no." I said firmly, "I was already a killer when I met him. The others did come after, Kalel's dad was a tool and I had a grudge against him anyway. Him tormenting Kabe was just the final straw, and that woman, Ti, that was just a case of wrong place, wrong time. Kabe never laid a hand on anyone."

"Jaha didn't seem to think so." Bellamy pointed out.

"Since when do you back up Jaha?" I sneered, "that guy was clueless. I told him that to his face, and he pretended to believe me for a while, before trying to lock Kabe up. But I sorted that one out. Got the kid out safe, don't ask how, and nearly tasered Jaha in the process while he was bugging me for answers." I let out a dry laugh, "you can imagine how annoyed that made him."

"Well then what?" Octavia asked, an eyebrow raised.

"That is a damn good question." I acknowledged, "Jaha thought I'd smuggled him down here, so I don't know. He could be alive, dead, hell if I know. But I need him to be alive." I looked up at Bellamy, knowing he would understand. "He's everything to me, I'd do anything to protect that kid, my responsibility, no one else's."

Bellamy's eyes flickered to Octavia, then he nodded, he got it. He knew exactly where I was coming from. He'd sacrifice anything for her, I'd do the same for Kabe. It didn't matter that he wasn't blood related, family was more than that. Kabe was family to me, and that was that.

"We should move." I said at last, turning to head over to Finn and the others.

Bellamy grabbed my wrist and I looked at him expectantly, "Rae, back on the battlefield, you said something."

Oh no, here it was, I had been dreading this. I'd told Bellamy I loved him and here it was coming back to bite me in the ass.

I panicked.

"I said a lot of stuff. I was pretty delusional, barely remember anything, must have been that knock to the head, huh?" I said quickly, trying not squeak.

Bellamy nodded hesitantly, before moving past me, "you're right. We should move."

_-_

"Tell us everything you know about your battle tactics!" The voice was sharp, and I felt a pulling sensation in my fingertips before a biting cry left my lips.

I could feel the new lack of fingernail, and the blood that was gushing out of the torn skin.

"I don't know!" I cried, my voice desperate, begging.

I wanted the pain to stop, anything to make it stop.

"You're lying!" She said, her tone incredulous.

This time a knife was plunged into my leg, twisted, causing my voice to rise up and an inhuman moan to rise up. I could feel every inch of the sharp blade pushing into my muscles, and flesh. I was tense, and writhing against my restraints, I knew tears were pouring down my cheeks and blood out of every wound.

"Tell us!"

"Leave me alone." I moaned, sobbing as I felt the knife get twisted more.

"You know everything, give us answers!"

I screamed as this time a burning cuff was bolted around my wrist, causing my skin to sizzle underneath the infernal metal. My own burning flesh made me want to throw up, but I couldn't stop screaming long enough to allow that.

It never ended, I wanted it to end.

More slashes across my skin, a painful one over my lip, burning on my thighs, a needle pushed into my tongue, hairs being pulled from places I didn't even know I had hair.

I could feel it, the darkness all around. Creeping in, in my eyes, in my being. I could barely remember myself, what was my name again? Or any detail about what happened before all of this.

I remembered pain, only pain.

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Here we go, sorry it took a while, but I finally got around to uploading it! And it's my birthday , so ayy.


-Lis x

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