Trigger - Part 2

CHAPTER 18 - Everything I could have hoped for

The warmth of his hand wrapped around the back of my neck, I feel myself being drawn in closer by his other hand on the lower part of my back. Every fiber inside my body is screaming. Everything about him steals every last bit of self-control I have left.

Huh!?

I open my eyes feeling him pull away, his forehead gently pressed against mine.

"I... uhm..." He clears his throat and stands more upright looking directly at me.
"I am sorry..." I notice him swallow heavily.

"It's....  Ah... it's okay..." I quickly brush my hair behind my ears and take a seat on the hospital bed.

"I have to get going... but, I'll see you around okay." He flashes a small smile, turns around and walks towards the door.

"Liam, wait!"

He stops and turns toward me. Disappointment in his eyes.

"Let's just take it slow and be... uhm..."
"Friends?" He helps me finish my sentence.

"Yeah..." I lower my voice hoping it doesn't hurt him even more.
He slowly nods his head and again flashes a sheepish smile.
"Sure..."

He opens the door and walks off.

Fuck... He is hurting...

I take a deep breath.

It's for the best Sage... you need to first heal properly before you even think of starting a relationship...

I take another breath while getting off of the bed.

You will need to be strong... now more than ever!

I quickly look at the door opening and see Shane enter.

"Are you not supposed to be in bed?"
"No, I am leaving."

His silent death stare alone tells me he knows better than to argue.

"You two patched things up?"
"Hm-mm..."

A line appears on his forehead as he steps closer.

"Doesn't sound too convincing."
"No it's...  it's just he has feelings for me."

"And you don't feel the same way back?"
"I don't know what I am feeling... I just think I need time to heal properly. Build a life for myself."

"Hm... and what about your memories? Are you trying to at least remember?"
"What is the point Shane? All I'll remember is the bad. I don't want that and besides what am I going to do if I do remember? I just feel like I need to concentrate more on my future."

He brushes over his head and sits down at the bottom of the bed's feet.

"So you don't want to remember any of us? The feelings we had? The feelings you have for me or Liam?"
"What difference is it going to make? I'll be forced to make a choice between the two of you... how am I going to make a choice like that? And are you two not like buddies now?"

"Forced? Who is forcing you?"
"You and Liam, Shane. You both tell me you have feelings for me. It is inevitable."

"No... you are scared that the day you remember is the day you know who you love more and you are scared to lose the other. You can't have your bread buttered on both sides, Sage."
"Yes, of course I am scared. I am scared of losing you both, Shane."

"So let me guess, you asked Liam to be your friend too?"

I stand silent, feeling guilt building.

Shane scoffs and shakes his head side to side slowly.