Into The Wild Blue

Mother Dearest

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Took the fire inside
One too many times
He's burning over and out
Now he flails
Up against the raging tides
No more fights
Everything you ever wanted to see
See it in his eyes
One more time, one more time
Climb down to test the waters
My hands feel like they're rusting away
So I'll pace around like a lamb before the slaughter
I'll stay here as long as you let me
Decision's been made obvious
So I will return
Where I started
I'll stay here
When I'm finished I'll whither away
Rip them out, take them
Burn to coals as they crush and leave nothing
That resembles a soul of a man
See him numb, see him crushed
See him numb, see him crushed
Rip them out, take them
Burn to coals as they crush and leave nothing
That resembles a soul of a man
Leave them numb, leave them crushed
Leave them numb, leave them crushed

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"You were supposed to love me before seeing me; You were supposed to love me in all my mistakes; You were supposed love me for what I am. A Mother's love was never supposed to be like this"

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Newark Liberty International Airport

"How are they?" You were facing away from Austin as you spoke.

"They've calmed down some, but they were both crying for an hour after you left," said the voice on the other end.

Glancing over at Renegade, you noticed him jumping up to hit the sign on the wall out of boredom. "The red-eye's delayed by an hour—" you began, then interrupted yourself. "Ren, stop that!"

Renegade stiffened and turned back to his luggage, wheeling it back and forth. "They'll be alright, dear. I'll take care of them," Loretta reassured you. "Thanks, Loretta," you replied gratefully. "How's Cowboy?" Loretta asked. You turned your head to glance at your husband, who sat with his hands in his lap, lost in thought as he examined them.

"He's... he'll be okay. We just need to get to David," you replied, turning around and taking a few paces away before lowering the volume of your voice, "He's a mess, Loretta."

"I can imagine," Loretta sympathized. "He blames himself," you confided. "There's no reason for him to think that. He's not to blame for this," Loretta tried to reassure you. "Unfortunately, there's plenty of reason for us to assume that," you sighed, feeling the weight of the situation pressing down on you.

In the midst of the chaos and uncertainty, you found solace in Loretta's understanding words. After all, she'd been supportive through everything that had happened in Montana. You felt a glimmer of hope and compassion speaking to her that you knew you wouldn't find in your mother, and began to truly recognize how your beautiful husband kept her so close to his heart all these years.

"You take care of Cowboy," she said "He needs you," "Always," you responded "I'll track your flight, make sure you get there safe," You nodded and angled your face away to brush a tear from your eye. "Okay, I'll talk to you soon,"

You ended the call and shifted your gaze back to Austin, who remained seated with his hands resting in his lap, his attention fixed on them. You approached him tenderly and settled beside him, observing his quivering fingers as they intertwined.

You reached out, gently lifting your hands to grasp his trembling ones, holding them tightly with all the love you could muster.

"My Cowboy," you whispered softly, "Settle yourself, my love," you murmured, seeking to soothe him with your presence. His face twisted and you watched as his composure shattered, his grip on your hands loosened and rose to his face to mute the sobs.