Feel The Heartbeat | Yeonbin

Chapter 30 - Love?

His head was probbing so hard and the light hitting his eyes felt blinding. His entire body ached all over. Groaning, Yeonjun tried to move but something was preventing him from doing so. Forcing his eyes open, he blinked several times through the haze.

Once his vision was clear he realized that he was NOT in his hotel room, judging from the look of the expensive suitcase against the wall. Finally, he realized that he couldn't move because of an arm around his waist.

He was in...he blinked open his eyes.

The realization woke him up like a bucket of cold water.

Sitting up, quickly, he groaned as a wave of nausea hit him. He breathed deeply several times, letting the feeling pass. When it did, he finally opened his eyes again and looked around the room.

There were several open bottles of soju and a bottle of vodka strewn all over the floor along with clothes. His clothes. And... two wedding rings.

The memory from the night before hit him fast like lightning.

+×+

After he had run from the beach and returned to his room, Yeonjun spent a good 30 minutes or so, crying. Meanwhile, Soobin had tried to get him to open the door, but he had shooed him away, wanting to be alone. After a while, he didn't want to be. 

So, he had gone back down into the lobby, alone, and asked if there was a convenience store nearby. In a daze, he didn't even know how he managed to leave and come back. But, when he did, he already had a bag full of soju bottles and a bottle of cheap vodka. Then, he found himself outside Soobin's door, knocking.

It immediately opened to show Soobin, already in pajamas. Yeonjun hadn't even showered yet. He raised the bag with a humorless smile.

"Let's drink," he stated.

Soobin, bless his heart, had indulged him. Sitting on the floor by the bed, Yeonjun consumed bottle after bottle, letting out his woes.

He could feel himself getting drunk, but he didn't care.

Soon, all the soju was gone and all that was left was the vodka. Soobin had stumbled to his feet to grab some paper cups from the desk, but Yeonjun was too impatient so he opened the bottle and drank straight from it.

The alcohol burned his throat, but he barely felt it. He was feeling numb.

"They're the ones who cheated," he mumbled as Soobin took the bottle from him and poured himself a cup.

Yeonjun couldn't tell if he was drunk either, he was really composed.

Nonetheless, he continued to ramble, "But, why do they get to be happy while we're miserable? It's not fair."

His eyes fell on the ring at his finger. It glinted back at him.

Everything that the ring symbolized and stood for was a lie.

Angrily, Yeonjun tore the ring from his finger and flung it at the floor. It bounced once against the carpet floor and laid there, mocking him.

He could feel the tears falling again and he angrily wiped them away. It just wasn't fair. He wanted to be loved too. He wanted to be held and made to feel important and special. He wanted someone to look at him like he was the world's greatest treasure.

"Yeonjun," Soobin said in a quiet voice. "Maybe it's time for us to just... give up. They don't love us anymore." He looked up at him, eyes glassy and unfocused. "We're better off finding someone else. You deserve better." Raising an arm, he placed a hand on Yeonjun's cheek, lightly. "We both do."

That touch sent a shiver throughout Yeonjun's body. He hadn't felt such gentle affection in so long. He was hungry for it.

And Soobin was such a beautiful man.

Feeling brave, Yeonjun crawled towards Soobin and plopped on his lap. Soobin let out a squeak, making Yeonjun laugh.

"Thank you," he slurred, hands going behind Soobin's head, playing with the little hairs there. "You're really... the best. You comfort me and make me laugh and do nice things for me when I'm sad." Then, he took Soobin's left hand, squinting at the expensive gold band on his ring finger. "Ryujin is blind... and stupid. because she can't see how amazing you are."

And he meant every word. Soobin was amazing in more ways than one. And... he was handsome to boot. He was the total package!

How could anyone not be happy being married to him?

Suddenly angry at Ryujin for hurting Soobin, Yeonjun removed the ring on Soobin's finger and threw it onto the floor too. It laid next to Yeonjun's own, both of them lying there, glinting under the light, side-by-side. Lonely.

Sniffling, Yeonjun brought his face closer to the Soobin's, catching a whiff of soju and Soobin's natural scent.

Soobin seemed to be breathing really deeply, one arm loosely wrapped around Yeonjun.

"Soobinn..."

"Yeonjunnie."

The voice made warmth bloom in Yeonjun's belly. Leaning, he whispered in Soobin's ear.

"Will you pretend to love me tonight? Please? I just... I want to feel loved... please."

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the second cliffhanger~

a/n: any idea what's gonna happen next 👀?