I DID NOT BELIEVE IN LOVE UNTIL I RIGHT SWIPED YOU

Turbulent Tides of Love: Navigating Through Pain and Passion

The new month starts and so we start. I would like to admit the fact that I guess I have attachment disorder or something of that sort, yes I self-diagnosed myself and I haven't told Khushi. I don't know how she will react maybe islie. Anyway, the month started well. We were fighting. Wonder why? I asked my girl to update me, as soon as she left the office and she did not, just so that she was safe. I just asked her to text me once you leave. That day she did not do it, and that is okay but what she said made my heart ache. She said I have a personal life I cannot update you every time. I mean it still hurts me as I type but I can't help, that night I shut myself like an indisciplined person and she did call me around 10 times all I was doing was sitting and crying. I broke one of the rules I made, we won't go to bed without sorting things out and yes we did not sort and sleep. I agree it was my fault for not talking to her. The next day I get a text, I want to break up, My world stands stuck for a moment. I try convincing her by every means possible until I accept the fact that we have broken. Out of anger, I was disrespected to an extent I would have never imagined in my life even I wonder if no partner would expect such a comparison but that's okay because it was her anger which said those things. I will tell you guys, that girl is my source of strength. If she isn't there I don't wish to be there on this planet and it was that day I decided to end my life at Suicide Lake, a very beloved place of mine. I went and sat there, and decided a time for me to die, 6:50 because sunset happens at that time, and after my girlfriend, the most attractive thing that I find is sunrise and sunset. Khushi said she does not care for me so I said I hope you will when you won't be able to express your care to me. I guess the words were thunderclap for her and on a serious note I would have killed myself that day I saw no point in my life at that particular time.
but my girl took care of me I agree with this, she was calm and asked me to go back maybe 20 times. But the words she said were so disrespectful and made me question everything I have done for her. I kept asking myself all these efforts to hear this. I don't like it when she apologizes but that day. I was feeling nothing, numb but as they say, right love is magical so it is indeed. She said Nishant I beg you and the next moment my heart felt heavy exact moment and I said you are a queen and you are my queen and a queen never begs and never do it again.
I went back and now I was the guilt that I made her apologize. I was sad about what she said but I was in guilt. She apologized and also sent me flowers and we were sorted even though I was wishing i would have died. Things again changed because of love. I was on a call with my girl at 9:30 pm she was cooking I was a little sad, my eyes were all bloodshot red reason being I cried that much. I was upset but as I heard the way her dad talked to her. All the upsetness faded and I was sad, why did he talk to her like that? Even the simple fact is that even if I have a sword inside me and I see her crying even though the sword hurts like hell I would still smile just so that she can be at ease and get comfort my pain becomes irrelevant when she is in pain and yes that's how I know how much I love her.
The fight got sorted. we were back to normal again. In 2 to 3 days things were perfect among us but she was fighting battles at her home against her parents and I was always and will always be there to support her.
A few days back she went with her office mates to a flea market in Delhi, one of them was a guy who was there and for him, she promised me that she would maintain social and emotional distance.
We make promises and abide by them, sometimes we break them but fix things back also. So this time usually when she is out she keeps me informed and all I ask her is to text me that she is okay or not every hour. I don't think a 10-second text every hour is a big deal.
So that day Around 11 am we were talking and she went abruptly offline. I was like okay. I sent my outfit checks 2 more pictures and I love you. She replied I love you more and the rest texts were ignored.
2 hours busy I am okay with it. I posted our book and its first chapter on Wattpad and I wanted to tell her. I said I needed attention and I sent 5 to 6 texts ( cute ones obviously) but I did not get any reply 5 minutes later I called her, and the call got declined. I was like haw who cut my call. Now I was tensed because last night she was talking about ending her life and I thought what if She came online but I was like talk to me she went offline again.
That is when I realized the difference in how we deal with each other. I  would keep my friend's aside to talk to her and she would keep me at the side when she was with her friends and idk. All I asked was two minutes of attention and when she was there to give two minutes of attention maybe after half an hour I was all irritated and emotionally sad and I needed love. I said I was breaking up (I have never initiated a breakup in these 10 months) and I accepted I'll regret it. I said it just to hear that don't go but to my shock, she was like okay.
she called me 4 hours later to sort it out.
4 hours is what it took for her to call me just so we could sort and yes she spoiled me on call I said I am a baby so I made a mistake and she got mad at it and now the sides were switched.
I was getting sadder with every passing moment and that is why I booked tickets for Delhi just so that I could see her the next day. We talked I apologized for being immature because I was immature and I agree but all I wanted was 2 minutes of attention. I had decided to sit in front of her office with a paper and ask for an apology for being immature because that was the only option I had, I spent all the money to go to Delhi. I just have 200 rupees left for the entire month and still 20 days are left for the month. I told her I was coming to Delhi, and she said she did not want to meet I said okay, and asked me not to come but by that time I was in an aircraft and it was midnight. She was sleepy so she slept around 12:10 am and my flight took off at 12:40 and guess what all I did was spam I love you for 30 minutes maybe around 500 I love you on the chat.
As soon as I landed she got up and we had a chat, we knew we would both sort it out and we were sorted on chat by 5 am and decided that we would go to the temple together. Before that, we agreed we would shower together (cute us).
same day we met at 10 a.m. We sat and talked, I know at times when I was speaking she must have been awwing such a cute baby but also at times she was mad and I agree she was right that breaking up for such an immature reason was not at all acceptable I did accept my fault and yes it was my fault and then we agreed we would find common ground, but before that, we went and got me some food I was too broke I spent all the money on the flight which was around 16k and yes
moving ahead now things were sorted she said she would update me in an hour and yes like good couples we were sorted but none of us knew that we would have two more fights the very next day.
Anyway, once she got me food we decided that we would take a shower and then go to temple.
Yes we did find a common ground and now things were sorted.

We checked in and I was wearing a formal shirt (I did not change since the last day ) yeah as soon as I got her I had to save the shirt from wrinkles so had to take it off and that was when Khushu came and kissed me on my cheeks. I mean that comfort that homely feeling the flood of emotions.
This man was all melted now. and then we went under the bedsheets she was applying for jobs while I was busy staring at her beauty and admiring her and us.
I kissed her on her cheeks and I was really happy that we were sorted.
she then went to the washroom to wash her hands
what a perfect opportunity for me. As I saw her, she was washing her hands I went behind grabbed her waist in a second, and roamed my hand all around her perfect waist, and then before even she would realize my hand was inside her pants seeing how wet and horny she was near me and my lips kissing her. Perfectly turning on the whore inside of her. she lying helpless with her hands covered with soap and was unable to resist and all she could do was lose control of her body and seek mercy for me to leave her as d fingered her hard and hard with every stroke just so that I could hear the lady moan. all I intended to turn her on and then do nothing about it, cause that's what she does most of the time to me.