The Searching Game

Chapter 1

"It's been like a year now, you need to move on and live life. You need to be with someone who can show you a better world."

"And who might that be?"

"Me." I gulped hard as my mind tried calculating every way out of this situation with the least damage. I decided to stand to get some space. The hurt look on Ellie's face made me feel bad.

"Ellie, I love you, but you are my best friend. You and Leo took in a broken eighteen year old with nothing to live for and made me into an adult. You are beautiful and in another life maybe we could have tried, but I literally love someone else and I will never be able to love you like that." I watched a tear start to fall and got on my knees in front of Ellie. I took her hands in mine and squeezed them. "You are fucking incredible, but I just can't love you how you want me to." She sniffled and nodded before moving to get up. "Nope, let's finish this movie first, okay?" Ellie sighed but gave in when I sat back on the couch. I restarted the movie and the awkward feeling in the air started to dissipate.

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I opened my eyes and yawned. I felt movement beside me and realized after we put in a third movie, Ellie and I fell asleep on each other. I carefully got up and saw the clock read it was 5:14 in the morning. I took a quick shower before starting a pot of coffee and breakfast. Once I ate, I knocked on Leo's door.

"Why are you disturbing me?" He grumbled as he rubbed the sleep from his eyes.

"Gotta head to work in like an hour or so, coffee is ready, I have a towel waiting for you to shower then I'll have your food prepped," I told Leo. Instead of answering he started toward the bathroom. I went to the stove and made Ellie's breakfast, then laid it on the coffee table in front of her. I gently shook her awake. She at least smiled at me unlike her brother. "Food is ready and coffee is on the counter. Leo will be out of the shower in a bit so you can hop in."

"Thank you, you're a saint," she chuckled before eating her meal. I had Leo's waiting on the counter for him when he left the bathroom looking fresh. Ellie went in after.

"So, how was the club?" I questioned as Leo washed his dishes.

"Shitty, couldn't get anyone's attention. I needed my wingwoman," he glanced at me with a playful glare.

"I'm sorry!" I laughed. "I just get so uncomfortable chilling in those gay clubs because those bitchy femmes always try grinding into me when we walk the floor." Leo put his dishes on the rack to dry before turning to me.

"I get that, but what if we go to a straight club tonight? We all have tomorrow off so Ellie is going too."

"I wouldn't mind going to the gym with Brennon tonight," I told him. Leo just laughed then so I gave him a confused look.

  "He's coming as well, you're stuck with us. Plus you know exercise after a tattoo is a no no." I rolled my eyes and shrugged.

  "I guess one night won't kill me if it's a straight club," I sighed as I gave in.

  "Perfect. Here," Leo grabbed his keys from where they were hanging and threw them to me. "Go to work and get shit started, I'll ride with El." I nodded and grabbed the denim jacket waiting for me by the door. It used to be Leo's when he was younger but it no longer fit. When I started living here, both siblings donated some clothes for me and we found a small dresser to set up in our living room. I loved this jacket almost as much as my old one considering all the patches Leo had collected from protests or marches he participated in. I went to our apartments first floor before walking to the garage and starting my drive to the diner. Last year in August, my trucker friend Matt stopped here in New York. I decided it would be my last stop with him since this was the furthest he traveled on his routes. We stopped at a truck stop and he bid me goodbye as I walked into the night. I walked for quite a while before coming to a 24 hour diner. It reminded me of home so I decided to go get a meal before finding a place I could crawl into to sleep. When I entered the diner I was greeted by Leo, who was helping the front of house night shift while working the kitchen too. He noted the worn out look of my clothes from constant travel and offered me a free meal. I insisted I could pay, but he refused. Leo disappeared into the kitchen and brought out a full breakfast platter. It was the most food I'd eaten in a while as I promised Matt he wouldn't have to waste any money on me. I was rationing what money I had from home. I had lost a bit of my muscle and weight from living off truck stop food and drinks. I demolished the food and spoke with Leo until his shift ended at three that morning since the person he was covering for arrived. I left when he did and in walking down the sidewalk, I heard him start up his old beaten Buick. The sound it made convinced me it was going to explode so I ran back and saw Leo struggling. I made him shut off the car and he grabbed a maintenance tool box from the diners supply closet for me. I fixed his car and tried to leave when he grabbed my arm and demanded to know where I would be staying. I told him the minimum of my situation and he immediately dragged me to a run down apartment building. I met his sister when he brought me up for the night. Once I heard snores from both their rooms as I sat on the couch, I made a quick decision to thank them after some sleep. At around six in the morning I snuck out and bought some groceries to make them breakfast, giving Leo the idea I should work with them. Since then I've lived on their couch and been their coworker. I even had a second job that I worked when I could a few blocks away at a car shop. I fixed whatever the main crew didn't want to work on. I had actually been working on saving money to help get us an apartment in a better area. It was because these people saved my life and I needed to help improve their lives however I could. Plus I would hopefully have my own bedroom too. It would take us all a step in the right direction. My thoughts stopped as I pulled into the employee parking lot. I made my way inside to see the night shift off and finish the prep work they hadn't yet. About twenty minutes later, Leo and Ellie arrived. The rest of our first shift crew began clocking in and we started our day. Leo kept naming clubs to go to tonight until we settled on one that wasn't as expensive. Tonight would be my first time at the club in a month or so. I hated getting flirted with, but if I stuck with my friends I would be okay.