Thinking Out Loud

Echoes of the Past

It always creeps up on you when you least expect it. That one thing you don't want to remember. The feeling that consumed your body once in the past is now replaced with a deep sense of dread as pit in your stomach. It's the one thing you tried so desperately to run far, far away from, to no avail.

A person from the past is here in the present to haunt me for the unforeseeable future.

Should I stay here and fight this echo? Or should I run, flee from this person I once called home? They're not home anymore, they're a shell of the person I once knew many moons ago. A shell that I'm not fond of whatsoever now.

-•-

We used to spend our life together, intertwined as one. Sharing the vanilla ice cream we'd always get at the beach in the summer, our lips dancing as one, connected under the moonlight and the sky full of stars. Except that by the time sunrise came, you'd be nowhere to be found. I used to believe you were like a sky of stars, always there, just sometimes only in spirit. Funny how I was so wrong.

The echo of the person you once were follows me. Begging for another chance, a fresh start, another shitty explanation as to why you were not my sky of stars.

During the cold night, you clung to me for warmth. While I pined for you all day, you were somewhere else, being some other girl's sky full of stars. That little cycle of yours was vicious, to paint yourself as something so beautiful all-the-while tarnishing the ideology of such a wonderful metaphor.

You ruined the stars for me. I look up at night and get reminded of the way you left me for someone else. My night sky is dark, empty.. not even the moon shines now.

-•-

Taking away my stars wasn't enough, clearly, because now I'm haunted by a false sense of sparkle and shine. It's so tempting to dip into the realm of light that I'm so deprived of, but I don't want to bathe in a sky full of deceit and filth.

Echo. You can haunt me forever, but I will never be tricked by your false sense of beauty again.
May my nights stay dark, and yours stay darker.