smiling critters

chapter 46 - the subconscious

(at a con with a friend while I'm posting this :D)

In the morning, dad had to go back to belgium and malachi had offered to drive him to the airport with neil so they could say goodbye. The car ride was spent planning out future visits and such. Once they actually got there, neil hugged his dad and thanked him for coming to visit, and dad said ‘you’re welcome’ and hugged back before giving him a small kiss on the forehead, getting his suitcase out of the trunk and leaving.

“So, how did you like meeting you dad?” Malachi asked as he adjusted the review mirror.

“i really liked it! it's a nice change compared to Godfrey,” Neil smiled and looked back at him.

“I'm glad you feel that way, angel face,” Malachi smiled and briefly stretched back to pet his surrogate son on the head. The conversation fell flat from there, with the only thing filling the car’s silence being Neil quietly purring. Once they got home, Neil spent time with his siblings, helped Malachi make dinner, and ate with his family before going to bed. He woke up on a beach towel underneath an umbrella surrounded by the beach. he sat up and looked around, the beach was completely deserted other than the towel and umbrella, which was odd because normally if there was an umbrella and towel, there'd be a bag or something holding other belongings, not to mention there’d be other people. Neil slowly crawled onto the scorching, sunbathed sand and stood up before looking around again. Behind the ocean was a flourishing meadow with a house a bit a ways away from the shore. With nothing else to do, neil began walking towards the house. As he got closer, he saw that they’d left the door open and were using the screen door for better ventilation. The closer he got, the more he could hear woman singing ‘i’m not ok (i promise).’ they sounded like soprano-alto. he quietly approached the door when suddenly…

“oh, there you are! come in, come in, I'm almost done with this!” The voice chirped as they came into view of the screen door’s mesh. it was mom. she was wearing a flowy white dress with a blue floral pattern, her hair was twisted into a loose French braid and her wedding band was hanging proudly around her neck, glowing in the sun that was breaching the screen door. how it was mom, Neil hadn't a single clue, but it was mom nonetheless, so he went inside and walked up to her. she was making something with kale and cockatrice.

“sit at the table, werecat. this is almost ready,” mom smiled and pointed at the table behind her, prompting him to walk over and sit down. the table had a bouquet of gardenias and irises in a glass vase in the middle while the photos that dad had taken of her and Godfrey. mom walked up to the seat beside him and placed a plate of kale and cockatrice salad in front on him as she placed the other plate in front of herself.

“I've been wanting to talk to you like this for a while. we have so much to catch up on!” she smiled as she stabbed her food with her fork and stuffed it into her mouth.

“how's your head after that fall? i know it was probably pretty scary, but trust me, Godfrey, your father and i all have stories like that. i tried to climb up a wooden lamppost one summer when i was visiting your grandfather in maine when i was about your age, and oh boy did i feel like a phoenix in a forest fire! one thing to take away from that is ‘don’t climb lampposts,’ but that should be common knowledge.”

“My head is fine, but why am i here? Why am i with with you?”

“Do you not wanna spend time with your mother, werecat?”

“No! I mean yes-” neil groaned. “I wanna spend time with you but i’m just a little confused why it’s like this.”

“Well how else would we be able to spend time together. Besides, isn’t this nice? You’ve never seen this house. It was the house your father and i bought after getting married. It was the house we raised godfrey in and the house i was pregnant with you in. it’s pretty odd though; i was expecting a beach house.”

“A beach house?”

“That beach house you and dylan like to spend time in.”

Neil got a little uncomfortable after she said that, considering what he and dylan would do in that beach house.

“Oh, don’t worry, i usually go check on your brother when you wanna spend alone time with him. Just use protection.”

“Moooom!”

“What? It’s an important conversation to have. You have to be safe when your doing stuff like that, and i haven’t lived on the earth for 40 years just to get prissy over sex talk, especially with my own son!”

He started laughing out of sheer discomfort as he put his fork down. He put his head down and kept laughing before he caught his breath and raised his head again to see mom lovingly staring at him and purring.

“You’re so pretty, y’know that?” she smiled.
“Yea, i’ve been told.”

“It’s true. You got my face.”

They continued to chat and gossip over their salad until the sun started to go down.

“oh! come with me, i wanna show you something!” mom smiled before quickly taking their empty plates and putting them by the sink. Neil stood up and walked back to the beach he woke up on, allowing him to see the sun setting over the waves as the sun’s light glistened on the water. It was a sight he’s seen a thousand times over, yet it's a sight he don't think he can ever get bored of.
“woah,” he breathed.

“it's gorgeous, isn't it? your father and i would go to the beach any chance we could to see this,” mom smiled at him and sat him down as she sat beside him before pulling him into her lap and hugging him before starting to purr. He purred with her and they just sat there, watching the sunset and purring; at least until neil heard shaky breathing and the occasional sniffle. He looked up at mom to see her crying.

“Hey hey, what’s wrong, are you ok?!” he panicked as he got offer and began to fuss over her.

“I’m ok, i was just thinking about how your brother got moments like this with me every day, and i never even got to hold you outside of a hospital room. Your brother got to do so many things with me that i could only ever dream of doing with you, and that hurts! no kitten should have to see their mother fighting for her life in a hospital room, they should be outside with her in the sun living life to its fullest! they should be able to hear her say ‘i love you’ for more than three years! i’m so sorry, my little werecat, for leaving you alone so early! for neglecting your brother’s special little brain long enough to let him think it was right to do that to you! No words in any language can express how sorry i am!” mom cried as she pulled him back into her lap and hugged him as tightly as she could, leaving Neil also crying and out of breath. she loosened up a little and now, instead of being focused on the sun going down, they were focused on each other; at least until Neil woke up. he sat up and stared at his closet door as he stared back in shock. then, after like a solid minute or two of staring at himself, he began crying. he curled into a ball and tried his best to breathe. he did care if the interaction he just had with his mom was fake, it made him feel closer to her. once he was done crying, he went into the bathroom and got himself cleaned up before going back into his room and going to bed.

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