smiling critters

chapter 45 - contemplation

Neil sighed as he listened to the waves at his secret spot. This was a spot he found back in intermediate school on his walk home. It was super peaceful so he decided to keep coming back. The place he ended up ‘committing suicide’ at in his dream was this place, and he assumed his subconscious brain came up with the idea both because of the suicide prevention hotline sign and the fact he’s met a lot of suicidal people here. They always had nice conversations and on occasion he’d find a note addressed to him saying that they were going to therapy and would stop coming back, which always made him happy. Whether they were getting help or couldn’t handle the pressure, they worried about neil, but he was never there for the reasons they were, he just needed some time away from people and he believed no one would bother him there, and other than the people wanting to dive into the ocean, he got what he wanted.

“Hey,” he heard a familiar voice from behind him, prompting him to turn around and see dylan walking up to him.

“How’d you find me?” he asked as dylan sat next to him.

“Your lovely lavender scent, my beloved angel food cake~”

Neil giggled. “Oh stop~””

They sat in silence and ended up snuggling a little until dylan moved his head to look at neil. Neil looked back.

“why did you eat that crayon? I won’t judge you or get mad at you no matter what you tell me, i just want you to get it off your chest.”

“You promise?” neil asked, looking nervous.
Dylan held out his pinky. “Pinky promise.”

Neil wrapped his pinky around dylan’s before sighing. “It’s been a pretty bad habit i’ve had since like… primary school i think? It’s something i’ve always been ashamed of, which is why i never told anyone about it, not even my therapist, and like- i know that she’d be chill about it but i’m still scared to tell her because what fucking 14-year-old eats crayons?!” neil backed away as he raised his voice. dylan placed his paw on his boyfriend's head in an attempt to calm him down while the end of neil’s tail aggressively flicked up and down.

“is there anything that'll get you to stop?”
“i dunno, not trusting me alone? especially with crayons.”

“how about you start by giving the box of crayons to penny for her younger siblings? if there are ones you already ate still in there we can toss ‘em or like- i dunno, make em’ into candles or something.” Dylan chuckled to himself.

“yea, that sounds nice,” Neil smiled as he snuggled closer to his boyfriend. They sat in silence snuggling and listening to the waves until Dylan spoke up again.

“why were you here? we're you gonna ju-”

“jump?! no. nonononono, never! i just like this place because no one else knew it existed, at least no on that i knew. I’d come here whenever i needed a break from both you guys and my family. Sometimes people that did wanna jump would come here and we’d chat for a bit until they left. after a few months of them coming here to chat they’d tell me that was probably the last time they were coming back because they were getting help, or they’d tell me via note. it was always good to know they were getting better. But i was always to scared to, but there was the occasion where I'd think ‘what would happen if i did?’ then I'd think of you guys and how sad you’d be if i stopped showing up to sleepovers, meet-ups etcetera.”

“That’s sweet. By the way, malachi and andy are looking for you, so we should head back soon.”

“Wait, shit, really?!” neil separated from dylan and sprung up from the bench.

“Yea, so we should probably start heading back,” dylan nodded as he stood up with neil as the american shorthair grabbed his hand and led him out of the forest. They went to the park for malachi and dad and when they got home, malachi thanked dylan and dad for helping to look for neil before letting them say goodbye to him and going home.

“Neil sit on the couch for me, i wanna talk to you,” malachi asked, pointing at a seat beside poppy on the couch. He sat down and malachi knelt in front of both of them

“Why did you feel it was necessary to run away?”

“I don’t know.”

“Ok, do you think running off was the right way to go about solving your problem?”

“No, probably not…”

“So what do you think you should’ve done?”
“Told you?”

“Good. now because you just ran off and didn’t tell me what was going on, i want your phone and you aren’t allowed to go outside other than to go to school for the next week and a half.”

“Ok, sorry.”

“I forgive you. Now onto you young lady,” malachi turned to poppy.

“You are not the other kids’ parent, yet you consistently act like you are. It isn’t your responsibility to discipline the other kids, especially for something like eating crayons, which is something that should be handled strictly by donna and i! You don’t have to be everyone’s nanny, ok? leave that to the adults.”

“Ok, sorry.”

“No, turn to your right and say that to neil, not me.”

Poppy scooted away a little and turned to look at neil.

“I’m sorry, neil.”

“Fooor?” malachi dragged out.

“Trying to discipline you for eating crayons when i should’ve let malachi do that.”

“Good, now neil, you apologize.”

“Poppy, i’m really sorry for running away and worrying you.”

“Ok, now both of you get to bed. i love you both, goodnight,” malachi smiled and hugged them both before going to tend to the other kids while poppy and neil went to their rooms and went to bed.

1002 words

ok, we're finally at the home stretch, only two or so more chapters left, then we're done! if i didn't say it before, I'll be going on hiatus so i can build up some content for whatever story y'all end up choosing. y'know, quality and quantity stuff. i just gotta say that this story was so fun to work on, even if i was starting to get a little tired of it sometimes, I'm so glad y'all have enjoyed it too and i can't wait to show guys what i've got planned next. ok, mwah mwah, have a nice day!