fake dating (bxg)

iv the game

i don't know what's wrong with me. i've completely been avoiding nate since we made out last sunday. it was what was best for our fake relationship but it still feels so scary to me. it's not like i don't like nate. spending the last month or so together has actually been enjoyable. i would say we're friends now. except from me ignoring him. i still turn up to our tutoring sessions but i don't say anything not about spanish. when he repeats a phrase back to me i try so hard not to look at his lips. he's tried talking to me about it and i've changed the subject back to spanish or just quite literally ran off. i ignored all his calls and messages and i've been doing a great job avoiding him.

elijah even approached me today. he properly spoke to me. i was in the queue at lunch when someone called my name.

"hey, tessa." he flashed a smile at me

"oh, hey what's up?"

"do you wanna come to my rugby match later? i've been seeing you with nate lately and i don't know if you guys are like dating or anything." this is what i've been waiting for. something is seriously wrong with me. because elijah is the reason i ever started "dating" nate in the first place and he's talking to me and practically asking me out and i don't even feel interested in him.

"yeah, we've been dating for a while a now." i gave him an apologetic look.

"oh, okay, no worries." he gives a sad smile.

"but sure, i'll come to the game," i say. genuinely not for elijah though. watching guys play rugby is so funny because they always look so stupid. and i don't know why he thought i'd think he was cute in one of those stupid mouth guards they have to wear.

the game is after school so after i text my parents to let them know i'm staying late, i walk over. i bump into elijah headed there too.

"hey tessa," he grins at me. it is so definitely bad that he's acting so interested in me right now and i don't even care.

"hi,"

"are you wearing that to my game?" he looks me up and down. okay, judgy.

"yeah, i am," i narrow my eyes and look at my outfit. i personally think it's a good fit.

"no offence or anything! you look cute," he says defensively. i should be internally screeching right now because he literally just called me cute. but im really not interested in him anymore. maybe i should call off the thing with nate. i don't need it anymore. nah. there's no harm! and he needs me. you know, for spanish. and stuff..

"thanks,"

"but everyone wears like, merch and stuff. to support the team. i have a spare shirt with my name on, if you want to borrow it. you can just wear it over the top," he offers.

"yeah, thanks. if you don't mind," i smile. i didn't know people dressed up like that for rugby games.

he goes and fetches it and then comes back and puts it on over my head for me. a month ago i would've been having heart palpitations lying on the floor but now i'm just finding it unhelpful and frankly rude that he thinks i can't put a shirt on by myself.

"there you go," he grins at me.

"thanks. good luck,"

"thank you tessa," he leaves with one last smile. he is so obviously into me. why am i not into him too? he has used my name in a sentence so many times. he gave me his jersey. he practically asked me out. and i'm not even that bothered.

nobody i really know is at the game. the only other girls there are seniors, moms or sisters and everybody else is guys. so i sit by a couple of senior girls and watch. elijah is probably a really good rugby player. but i don't watch a lot of rugby. so i don't find it that interesting.

a few minutes into the game, someone comes up to me. i know from the smell of whatever cologne he wears who it is.

"you're avoiding me," nate states the obvious.

"i'm sorry. you probably hate me," i sigh nervously. there's no point in denying it.

"i could never hate you, tess." he gently grabs my chin. well now i'm blushing. like a stupid tomato. good to know my nervous system does in fact work. "why are you ignoring me though?"

"i don't know," i lie and scratch my neck. it's a habit i picked up from spending so much time around him. nate does it all the time and it rubbed off on me.

"is it maybe because of our fucking hot make out session?" he smirks.

"it wasn't a make out session. and no. i've just been really busy. with school and friends and stuff,"

"so we're cool?" he asks.

"yes. we're cool," i nod. if i'm being totally honest, i've found myself missing him a bit. i will never admit to that though.

"can you take that jersey off though. you're supposed to be my girlfriend," he says it like it's a joke but he looks at elijah's name on it like it's threatening him. i take it off and my shirt underneath nearly rides up until he holds it back down for me.

"thanks,"

"so can i kiss you right now? elijah is looking right at us," he looks at something behind me. i assume it's elijah. i go bright red again. you know that phrase, when you wait for one bus for a long time and then three buses appear or something along those lines? that's what's happening right about now. when i was talking to elijah earlier i couldn't at all blush and it was freaking me out. now i can't stop. but now that i know my nervous system is intact i can focus on elijah because i'm sure my nonexistent feelings for him earlier was just a blip. and i kind of liked kissing nate. maybe. i manage a nod and before i know it his lips are on mine. i don't want to admit it because it feels wrong but i've been fantasising about this for a while now. we kiss passionately again, my hand in his soft chocolate hair and his around my waist. i missed this. i missed us. when we finally break the kiss i realise elijah is really far away down the pitch. facing the other way.

"he's not even here." i laugh.

"guess i mistook him for someone. they all look the same from here." he shrugs.

"you're such a dick," i sigh.

"honestly! you need to stop cussing so much. it makes me uncomfortable," he pretends then adds, "i hope you haven't forgotten our tutoring tonight, after the game."

"nope,"

"alright. love you, bye," he flashes a smile and wanders back to his seat. what was that? he just said he loves me. well, he didn't say 'i love you', he said 'love you' and he said it quite quickly. i'm sure he didn't mean it like that. but that isn't stopping the butterflies in my stomach. nah, actually, screw butterflies. there is an entire zoo in my stomach right now stampeding around.

i tried using roman numerals for the chapter names but it's just annoying me last chapter i really wanted to write iii, i shot the sheriff (thanks a lot bob marley) and this one reminded me of iv drips. why!!!!