Sister of Gods (A Thor fanfiction)

Chapter Five: Flame

The only people that I ever opened up to after Thor's banishment were Loki and Ebbe, the only people I could trust around here. No one else seemed affected that their prince had just been banished, or maybe no one dared to react. But the ones who should react are Father and Mother, and they are doing nothing.

Mother is still smiling and tending to her daily duties like she always does. I understand that maybe pretending Thor never existed would be her way of coping with losing a son, but deep inside of me, something made me think that wasn't her way of coping at all.

Father, of course, grew colder without the light of Thor shining around him. Whenever I passed him on his throne, he would always stare ahead like I wasn't there. It was like everyone and everything in Asgard had dimmed. There was no more light. Certainly not for me as well.

Ebbe had found me in my room after Loki dropped me off, saying he'd leave to give me a bit of space. When Ebbe finally entered my room to prepare me for dinner, she found me overthrowing a table with glass littered all over the floor from a vase I had smashed onto the ground. I was curled up in a corner, my breath coming out in gasps, as Ebbe ran over to me and simply hugged me close to her. She apologized, over and over again, even though I'm not sure what for. But I hugged her back, and she held me for as long as I needed.

"My daughter?" My mother's voice snapped me out of my thoughts. "May I come in?"

Finally realizing that she had been knocking on my door for a while, I nodded my head. "Come in, Mother."

My mother came in and then smiled, seemingly trying to smoothen out the mood. I bit my lip and crossed my arms, not able to return the smile. My mother sighed and then sat down on my bed while I sat at my desk. "How are you, my little princess?"

"Do I have to answer that question?" I whispered to my mother.

"Darling, I understand how upset you are and I understand." Mother reached forward and took my hands in hers. Her hands were cold, compared to mine, and I closed my eyes, wishing that I didn't have to listen. Thunder blue eyes. Unruly blonde hair. Mjolnir. My brother... I slammed down on those thoughts. I can't have them now. If I do... then I'd most likely end up crying yet again.

"Then, Mother, why?" I asked her, "Why do you act like nothing has happened? Is it because of Father? It seems like you're just... not reacting to Thor's banishment at all, and I..."

Mother's hands trembled in mine as she responded, "Astrid, that was cruel. Your brother's banishment hurt me beyond pain. That was my son that just left Asgard. My own husband had to force our son away. Do you know how much that hurts your father? Do you know how much that hurt me?"

"I..." My shoulders shook.

"Astrid, I understand your pain." Mother squeezed my hands gently, but firmly. "I miss your brother, too, but we have to move on. I understand it's hard, but move on, my dear. It'll make life easier."

That kind of snapped me. "How can I just move on, Mother, when my brother just got banished?! Father didn't even come to comfort me when he saw me there, on the ground, sobbing my eyes out. I can't forgive Father that easily. Mother, moving on is not that easy either."

"I understand that, my love, but I'm just saying that it will be easier if you do." Mother said, "I have moved on, and I am finding peace."

"That is not peace, Mother." I shook my head, "That is denial, and that is not healthy. Mother, it is alright to grieve, it is alright to be sad. Don't push your emotions down, please."

"I can't let my emotions overtake me, darling." Mother sighed, brushing her hair back. "My duty as queen, the one who sits next to the Allfather on the throne, overshadows it all."