I Think I Like This Little Life?

Chapter 3

Luke's POV

The next morning I woke up feeling around my bottom, and to my relief, I was dry. I was so excited I did a little victory dance as I got up, then realized how ridiculous it was for a 17-year-old to celebrate not peeing the bed... I walked into the bathroom, did my morning business, brushed my teeth, and then went downstairs to eat breakfast. I knew my mom would still be out since she worked late last night, so I just made myself some cereal and sat down in front of the TV, putting on 'Shameless'. Once I finished eating I put the bowl in the sink and went back to watching my show. I sat there for probably 2 episodes before I heard my mom coming down the stairs. "Morning, how was work last night?" "Oh, good morning, you startled me," she said with a jump. "It went well, not too many codes." I nodded looking back at the TV, my mom joining me with a cup of coffee. "Luke, please change this. You know I don't like when you watch this show. It's inappropriate." "Ughhh, Mom, but it's so good! Just watch it!" "Lucas, no." "Ugh. Fine." I hand my mom the remote and she puts on the news, I sit with her for a minute before getting up to go change my clothes. I was supposed to meet the guys at the park to shoot some hoops today. After I'm changed I go tell my mom where I'm going and head down the street. 

When I get there I see Ethan, Tanner, and Charlie playing already. I jog up, "Hey, guys! Y'all playing horse?" "Hey, Lu! Yeah, we just started, wanna join?" Tanner said. "Oh, yeah!" Ethan passes me the ball and I make it with a swish. "Oh, hell yeah!!" "Let's go Lu!" I passed the ball to Charlie and it went around in a circle for a while until Tanner finally got 'E', making him the loser. "Dammit, why am I so bad at this game?" "You're not bad, you suck," Ethan laughs, us all joining in.   "Guess I better just stick to football..." "I agree." "Hey, y'all wanna play some 2-on-2?" I ask. "Nah, man. I gotta get home," Charlie says. "Yeah, and he's my ride," says Tanner. "Well, alright-y. We'll see y'all later." Ethan and I wave goodbye to them, and then Ethan starts walking toward my house with me. "So how was last night?" Ethan says. "Hm, it was good. It was nice to be alone in the house." "Oh, I bet it was. But I meant your bed... how was...." "Oh, uh," I say my face going red. "It was fine. I was fine. Why are you even asking me? I don't want to talk about that." "Sorry dude. I didn't know it was going to be such a big deal... was just worried about you." "Ethan I'm fine, I'm almost an adult. I can take care of myself. I don't need you asking me." "Gosh. Okay. Fine. Bye, I'll see you tomorrow." Ethan says walking in the direction of his house. I sigh, knowing I was being too harsh. He was just looking out for me... But I don't need anyone looking out for me, I'm practically a grown man. I don't need anyone-- I'm thinking when I start to feel my crotch getting warm. I look down in shock and start running towards my house, urine running down the inside of my legs and by the time I open the front door, I finish. I stand in the doorway of the house in complete shock, just looking down at my very wet pants. I can't believe I just wet myself without any warning. Just as I thought I was going to make a clean getaway without my mom finding out, she walked down the stairs. "Oh, Luke. Honey. Did you have an accident?" She asks looking at my pants. "I-uhh... yeah..." "Luke, did you wait too long? What happened?" "I uh- I didn't know... I didn't know I had to go until I... was" "Oh honey... go get cleaned up." I walked up the stairs and took a shower, coming back downstairs I threw my dirty clothes in the washer to the next to be cleaned. I made my way back upstairs, hoping that my mom would just let me be for the night.

I was lying on my bed watching TikTok on my phone when I heard a knock and saw my mom slowly opening the door. She was holding some sacks in her hands, "Hey Sweetie, I have.. some things for you." I look at my mom wearily, "Oh yeah? What is it?" "Well, sweetheart, when you got your classification I went over to the store and picked you up some things." She sat the bags down on my bed and started to show me the contents. There was a package of pull-ups and diapers, she had some pacifiers, a sippy cup, and a bottle. There were also a few clothing items, she pulled out a few plain white, black, and grey onesies. As she pulled the items of out the bags all I could do was stare at the items and feel my independence slowly slipping away. "Mom! What, why would you get all of this stuff? I haven't had any signs of little space or anything!" "But, honey you have. You've been having accidents, and, sweetheart, you've started sucking your thumb in your sleep. I've noticed certain mannerisms that you've been doing. It's okay sweetheart, these are not all things you need immediately. I just wanted to be prepared for when you did. Let's just start with a pull-up tonight, okay?" I looked at my mom, my eyes hazy with tears. "I-um- I guess," she was right. About all of these things, maybe I did tend to wake up with my thumb in my mouth, and that started a couple of months ago. I did watch more childish shows sometimes... I do sleep with Ellie, too... but I think everyone does that, right? I watch as my mom gathers the items and puts some away in my closet. She takes paci and sets it on my nightstand, "Just in case you want to try it." And she leaves the room with the cups that go to the kitchen.

I stared at the package of pull-ups on my bed for a few moments before finally taking one out. It was blue and white and had cute little puppies on it. I turned it over in my hand and saw the 'BACK' stamp on the back. I slowly stood up, not believing that I was doing this, and slowly took off my pajama pants and underwear. I opened the pull-up and slid it up my legs and onto my hips. It was... thinner than I expected. But I could still feel the padding between my legs. I looked at my full-length mirror and a few tears dripped down my cheeks. I looked like an overgrown toddler. I couldn't believe that this was what I was being diminished to... I knew I would eventually, but not now. My mom softly knocked on my door, "Can I come in?" I didn't respond, and I saw the door slowly open. My mom looks at me, "Well! I'm glad they fit well, turn around baby." "Not a baby..." I said softly, as I turned around. "Oh, I know sweetie. That's not what I meant. I always call you that." Logically, I knew that. But this time it felt personal. I slowly turned around as my mom looked at the fit of my pull-up. "How does it feel, Luke?" "Fine." "Well alright sweetheart, you best get to bed. You have school in the morning. I brought you up some water." I turn to see the sippy cup she bought me filled with water. "Mom! I don't want that!" I yell, stomping my foot. "Lucas, it's just so you can drink it in bed without spilling it. It's just a cup." I grumble a bit climbing into bed without putting my pants back on. My mom pulls my comfort up, covering me and I wrap my arm around Ellie, pulling her close. "Do you want your cup, sweetie?" I nodded at my mom since I was feeling dehydrated from all of the crying I had been doing. I turn as she hands it to me, and I see the time on my alarm clock. It was only 8 o'clock, but I was already exhausted. I take my cup from her and take a long drink as my mom watches, and then put the cup back on my nightstand. She pushed the hair off my forehead kissing me, "Do you want to try your paci hun?" I contemplated it, and ultimately my mom handed the paci saying, "Here, just you hold onto it and you can decide on your own, how 'bout that?" I nodded taking it in my hand. My mom walked out of the room with a "Good night, sweetie. I'll see you in the morning." "Night, Mom," I said with a yawn. Once she shut the door I turned on my side with Ellie and played with the paci in my hand. I guess it wouldn't hurt to try? I just don't know how I feel about it, I'm supposed to be a 17-year-old, not a toddler. But if it helps... I slowly raise it to my lips and put it in my mouth. I try a little suck, and it feels weird at first, but I eventually get a rhythm down and, honestly, this thing feels nice. It's comforting and just feels natural in my mouth. I continue thinking about everything that has happened today, as I fall asleep. 

 The next morning my mom came in to wake me up, which is becoming the usual, I sit up rubbing my eyes, and feeling around my bottom and pull-up. I jump up excited, "I'm dwy!!!" I say just realizing the pacifier was still in my mouth. "Good job sweetheart! Why don't get ready for school, while I go finish up breakfast?" I nod to her, spitting the pic out of my mouth astonished that it stayed in all night. I made up my bed, setting Ellie up with my pillows, and then placing my paci on the nightstand. I went into my bathroom stripping off my clothes, and then ripping off the dry pull-up and throwing it away. I took a quick shower and got dressed, heading downstairs I put my backpack and shoes at the bottom of the steps. I walked over to the island sitting next to my mom where she was already eating breakfast. I quickly ate and grabbed my lunch saying bye to my mom on the way out this morning. I walked down the driveway to Ethan's car getting in. We greeted each other and then I said, "Hey, listen man. I'm sorry I got so upset with you yesterday. I understand that you're my best friend and you're just looking out for me, this is all just really hard. I-um-I actually had an accident walking home yesterday, too. I know that my body is going to change whether or I want it to, I'm just having a hard time adjusting. So I'm sorry I lashed out at you, I just... I'm just embarrassed." "Thank you for apologizing Luke, I get it. Well-obviously I don't completely, but I understand having a hard time adjusting to all of this. It's a complete change in how you live your life, but that's what I'm here for. Is to be your friend and help you through those changes. I guess I was just trying to say that without saying it. You can always talk to me about anything you're going through." "I know that.. and thank you. You're an amazing friend, and I will always confide in you whenever I need it." "Of course, man." When we finished our conversation we had been parked at the school, so we got out and headed in. 

Word Count: 2027

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