Where the Stars Are

Haunting Terrors

"Allura, no! I won't let you sacrifice yourself. I can't lose you."

"Lance, you are the only one who can do this. You have to save the universe. You can do this. I believe in you."  

"You HAVE to SAVE the universe."

Have-to-save-the-have-to-save....

Must-save-must-save-must-save......EVERYONE! 

###

Lance eyes opens wide with unhinged force; cold sweat sticks his hands together. His heart pounding as if trying to escape its own boned cage and his head like a boulder on his neck. Dark circles had begun to form like bruises underneath the eye-sockets, sleep-deprived. His chest weighs heavy, crushing him, rendering him unable to breathe. He curls underneath the heavy phantom mass, wishing he was somewhere else. Wishing he was with her. 

It wasn't always like this. Once, he dwelled peacefully, with the Galra all just a memory and finally back with his family; Lance felt as if he could start a new life. With Allura's message of peace and hope spreading throughout the galaxy, everything seemed harmonious, yet he is far from accepting her sacrifice.

The blanket, thrown carelessly to one side of the bed, eyes wondered lazily to the clock beside his mattress. 11:00am.
Lance is suddenly hit with another bolt of panic as he scrambles out of his sheets and out of his room. Heat rushes to his head, vision blurred while looking from one room to the next. Empty. Empty. Empty. He finds himself all alone. The McClain family had left for the weekly market without him.

How could they, don't they know the risks?  Thousands of "what ifs" began to swirl around Lance's mind, causing the world to shrink around him, drowning everything out. He could hear nothing but the sound of his fleshy organ bashing inside of him, while dripping in cold sweat. Another panic attack had taken hold. 

***

"You should have seen the Puigian's face when he saw where milk came from," Veronica laughs. Her smile as big as a saucer, to Lance it looks sickening. 

"Yeah. Yeah. I think his face looked something like this-" Luis tries to make a disgusted face, although it is ruined by him trying not to laugh. 

"Luis, no! You made it look like he was constipated," Marco chimed in. 

He stuck his tongue out and started gaging, to illustrate the Puigians reaction. An eruption of laughter from the three fills the room, echoing off the walls and clinging onto the paladin's ears. Lance felt as if he was about to throw up, the betrayal stung him too deep, he couldn't make sense of any of it.   

"Well, I'm glad you all had fun," Lance remarks nastily.

A hushed silence falls over the three McClains as they look at each other guiltily. 
 
"Lance, you needed rest, you haven't slept properly in days..." Veronica advances towards him, her hand reaches out to comfort the paladin. He reacts abruptly to her touch like it was venom, Marco eyebrows raise with concern. 

"...Not to mention whenever you do come...you are quite......overprotective," the paladins brother added. Marco was referring to when the paladin would set strict guidelines to what they could buy, expressing constant worry about the sibling's safety. Lance would micromanage all their purchases and he made sure to avoid certain vendors or areas he would deem 'unsafe'. The paladin's behavior was a bit drastic at times, but he was doing the best he could to keep them out of danger. Why can't they see that? 

"You're always overreacting to minor issues. So, excuse us for trying to get some peace and quiet." Luis was exasperated, he found it difficult to tolerate Lances disruptive behavior at times.  

Lance staggered back, his mind racing as he tried to process what had just been said. 

"Lance-," Veronica started, she looked like she was trying to diffuse a bomb that already begun to explode. The paladin wanted nothing of it.

 "No."

He shook his sister off. "If I'm such a burden; I'll leave," and with that he stormed out of the room.

***

Lance couldn't sleep. It was well past midnight and he kept thinking of what his brothers had said to him. He couldn't help but feel like he was unwanted.

How could he properly honor Allura's death wish if he wasn't wanted? 

An idea started to form in his mind; if he wasn't welcomed here, he would go somewhere else. Where though?  He didn't care, he just needs to escape. The paladin hadn't known how much he was trapped until the lock had been displayed right in his face. 

Lance got out of bed and begun to pack his essentials. While he packed, he considered writing a note, so he got out his display screen.

To Veronica, Marco & Luis,
I can't stay here any longer. Don't worry I'll be fine, contact if needed.
Love you all, Lance.

The paladin set the display screen on a desk, so it would be impossible to miss. He packed the last of his belongings and ventured out to find the only two nerds he knew who had access to shuttles.