Freelance Sex Slave

KINKY STORIES : THE BIRDS AND THE BEES

Once a month, Joshua and I host a live storytelling and performance event about being kinky.  Here are some of the stories we collected. 

Hi. I'm gonna tell you what kinky means to me. My pen name is Karma Said. I'm a writer, a happily married mother, and a sex slave. I'm the FREELANCE sex slave of a man who's not my husband. He's that guy over there, Master Joshua. Wave, Master. Being a FREELANCE slave basically means that I take dick, but not crap. Figuratively speaking. Literally, it's negotiable.

But that's not what I wanted to talk about tonight. What I actually want to talk about is my kids. I have two boys, 6 and 8, and they don't know about the whole... mommy being Joshua's sex slave thing. My husband knows, and very begrudgingly accepts it. The kids do know Joshua, as one of Mommy's crazy friends who occasionally hangs out with them, but they don't know that we fuck. That would literally make Joshua a Mother-F**ker to them. And "Yes, he's a mother f**ker, but he's YOUR mother-f**ker" probably won't do anyone any good.

My husband, their father, came to accept my lifestyle by accepting the premise that "kinky" is an innate sexual identity, just like "Gay "or "Trans" are. So if I'm kinky, and he isn't, letting me have my own thing does kinda makes sense. The same logic won't work with the kids though, because, well, they're kids. How do you explain kink to somebody who doesn't even know how babies are made? We had that conversation just a few months ago, and it didn't go quite as expected.

So we're on our way to school, and the bigger one asks:"mom, how are babies made?" and then he says "nevermind, I already know." And I'm like, "Really, ok, so tell me, how are babies made." and he says: "The man mixes some of his blood in a raw egg, and then he FORCES THE WOMAN TO DRINK IT."

Those were his actual words: "The man mixes his blood in a raw egg and FORCES THE WOMAN TO DRINK IT." The little one was like "Ha, really, how interesting, tell me more," So I was like ok boys, we gotta talk. I may not be able to explain my extramarital power dynamic yet, but no sons of mine are going through life with THAT crap in their heads, right? I mean, next thing you know, I'm going to be getting calls from the teacher about third graders forcing little girls to chug eggnog in some weird rapy pagan ceremony. NO way am I taking the blame for THAT. So when the kids get home that day, I'm like boys, no homework, no chores, sit down, there's a movie I want you to see. Now, I selected this little YouTube documentary on that pretty much delivered the basics, but the kids got interested in the science and wanted to watch more. So we're going deeper and deeper into chromosomes and DNA and cells dividing and whatnot. When it came to sperm, the little one was like, "Whoa, bro, did you know we have TADPOLES in our balls"?, and he's already squishing his tiny balls to, feel if there are tadpoles inside. And I'm like, hmmm, I'm not sure this actually helped clarify anything. So I ask them "do you understand how babies are made now"? Now the big one's already getting bored, so he's like "sure, I get it, can we go play legos noe. " But the little one, he's a more thorough thinker, he doesn't like not understanding shit, and he's all confused and like on the verge of tears. He's isn't getting it, so i try to boil it down for him. I say: "the man puts his sperm inside the woman's body, the sperm goes into the egg, and they mix their DNA's to create a brand new cell that grows into a baby."

The big one looking all smug, like " ya, that's exactly what I said," but the little one is still confused. "but how does the sperm get from the man's body into the woman's body. does she really drink it, like bro said?"

I say no, the man puts his penis inside the woman's vagaina and the sperm comes out from the tip of the penis. That just makes him more frustrated.

"But how? How does the man's penis fit inside the woman's penis"?

And I'm like, OH... I see where the problem is. You think that a vagina is just a different name for a penis, because you never seen one. But the vagina isn't at all like a penis. It's shaped like a hole that the penis is meant to fit into And then he's like oh, I get it. I get it. It's like a butthole. And I say ya, essentially, kinda, in general terms. So he's like, so if the penis goes into the butthole, can it also make a baby? Is that how gay people have babies"?

Now the bigger one is getting all antsy, he's done. I'm done too, I'm like sweating. The boy is barely six, I don't know what he knows and where he knows it from, so I just say, "No, men can't make babies by putting their penis in a butthole, but they can put it there if they want." And the little one, you can see his face very slowly light up, and he says: "So you're saying is, that I can put my penis in my brother's butthole if I want." I started to explain That's really NOT what I was saying, but the big one just had enough. he said, "no, you can't put your penis in my butthole because I wanna play Legos now. let's go". they ran out and that was the end of that.

So, in the next few days, things kinda fell into place. The boys asked some follow-up questions, they seemed to get the general idea, they told their dad, and he said 'Good job explaining', I felt good about myself, things were looking up. Until a few days later, they're taking a bath together, and the older one gets on his hands and knees, parts his but cheeks, looks over at his brother, and says, "NOW you can put your penis in my butthole. I'm ready". the little one gets all excited and he's getting on his knees, and starting to aim, and I'm like "NONONONONO, you can't do that. Absolutely not."

And the little one, he looked so heartbroken, and he's like "But why??? You said men can put their penis in a butthole if they want." And I say "MEM can, but you're a child. Your penis isn't ready for that. " Then I look down and see his penis actually IS ready for that, about as ready as 6-year-old penis can get. And his looking at me and his face says i don't know, It sure FEELS ready." So I say "Your brother isn't ready for that either", and he's on his knees with his spread open and HIS Face says hmmm, no, I feel pretty ready too," and I'm trying to not scar or traumatize or shame them so I shoot for the most non-judgemental statement I can find, which is, you can't put your penises into another body till you're grown because it will damage you internally.

So the little one sits down, and the big one puts his butthole away, and they both look honestly disappointed. The little one says, "Ok, but when we're grown, THEN i can put my penis in my brother's butthole."

And I'm like "Yes, when you're grown there are many places you could put your penis. Just not in your BROTHER." And he starts to cry. Tears, actually rolling down his cheeks. He says, "But I REALLY REALLY LOVE HIM. I want to put my penis in HIM, I don't care about anybody else. Why can't I? If I wait till I'm grown, and he wants it, and I want it, why couldn't I?"

They're both looking at me, and I'm like, this is it. This is my moment of truth. So I take a deep breath and say: "Ok. When you are fully grown, that means 21 and older, if you and your brother still really really want to put your penesis inside each other, I will support your right to do so." THAT's what being kinky means to me. It means that if I want to tell my kids the truth and have them accept me as I am, I have to lead by example. "