Chapter Twenty-One

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SYDNEY

We arrived back at the villa at ten past four. Everyone was awake now, which was surprising. I felt a little sick on the boat ride home, but it was nothing Henry's method of comfort couldn't handle.

We didn't talk as much on our walk back to the villa. I thought Henry assumed I needed to walk in silence to try and combat the nausea. But now that we were back and he still had a cold exterior, I didn't know what was going on.

"Oh, welcome back, lovebirds," Lily said as she walked over and gave us one big group hug.

"Hi," I laughed.

"You're just in time to get ready for the engagement party," she said.

My face dropped. "Wait that's tonight? I thought the whole trip was the engagement party?"

Lily laughed. "I thought so too. But tonight's the night we'll dress up and drink wine. Matthias will be doing a speech too."

I nodded. "Before his vows?"

Lily nodded. "You can never say too many things about your fiancée."

"Okay, that's cool. The only issue is that I didn't bring a really nice dress to wear."

Lily furrowed her brows. "What did you pack then?"

I cringed. "Just a lot of shorts and singlets. I didn't even think to bring some nice dresses. God, that was stupid of me."

Lily held my hands in hers. "No. Don't worry. Come get ready with me. You can borrow one of mine."

I nodded. I figured Henry wanted some time alone since his cold exterior was still melted on him like armour. Getting ready with Lily sounded like a blessing in disguise.

"Thank you for this," I cried.

She shook her head. "Don't sweat it. Let's go." She dragged my hand and pulled me to her bedroom. I gave Henry one last smile, and he returned a small one. That was good. It was better than nothing.

Lily's room was about half the size of ours, with a queen bed in the centre and a giant vanity at the base of it.

"There's only one seat, but we can just sit on the edge of the bed to do our makeup," Lily said.

I nodded, before asking if I could use her shower real quick. She said yes, of course, and told me I could use the spare towel on the railing. I should've just gone back to my own room, but I didn't know what to do about Henry. We had communicated so well up until now. The cold shoulder wasn't part of our arrangement.

I felt the icy water fall onto my chest as I rested my face under the shower head. I held my eyes closed and replayed the memories of Henry comforting me on the boat.

"Come here," he said as he put my arm around me. I couldn't stop myself from nestling into his side. He was so inviting. He always was.

"Put these in, turn on the noise cancelling feature and lie on my lap so you can stare straight into the horizon."

Jeremy always told me I was imagining things when I felt motion sick, which would usually lead to me sitting alone on a toilet floor with my head in the bowl. This was the first boat ride I'd managed to get through without running to the nearest exit.

My initial reaction to Jeremy's message this afternoon was excitement because this was what I wanted, right? I wanted Jeremy back. I wanted to be with him and get us to a point where I could actually say yes to his proposal. That was all part of the deal. Right?

But I didn't want to call him. I was scared. Maybe I was scared of wanting him so desperately again. Because while knew I deserved better, half of me wanted the comfort that our relationship brought. But maybe I was scared of not feeling anything when I heard his voice. Because that would make half of this arrangement with Henry void, and I was terrified of telling Henry I'd wasted his time.

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