𝙼𝚢 𝙼𝚎𝚍𝚒𝚌𝚒𝚗𝚎

𝚃𝚠𝚎𝚗𝚝𝚢 𝚃𝚑𝚛𝚎𝚎

| Miami Florida - 4:30pm |
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Joy Jackson's POV :

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You ever felt so much love for another person? Not the feeling of love you feel about a family member. The love that consumes you, the love you would do anything for, the love that has your mind in a loop, the love that no one would understand even if you tried to explain it, the love that you would live for....or die for.....

I felt that way about Hakeem. He made me feel something I had never felt before. He made me feel alive when I felt dead inside.

He made me feel like I could do anything. He never once judged me, never once tried to make me somebody I'm not. He accepted me and accepted my flaws.

it's like being sick, you don't feel good and then you take some medicine to feel better...well Hakeem was my medicine....He made me feel better at my worst.

I would do anything for that man...good or bad...you wanna know why? Because....he was my man and I was his woman. I would kill for him, I would live for him and I would die for him....

You see...when people say the words "ride or die" they never really know what they're getting themselves into. I didn't know what I was getting myself into but I didn't care.

I liked taking the risk, I liked having a man to call my own...especially the king of the streets. He was feared by all and I think that's the thing that attracted me to him the most.

He could make a million mistakes and I would take him back everytime.

But as I sit here, looking at our beautiful daughter and writing...whatever this is...I've stated to accept the fact that Hakeem and I will never be the same again.

He took my family from me...he got my mother killed and killed my own brother with no remorse with three shots to his chest...

I could never forgive him for that. I can never look him in the eyes and forget about all of that....its been a year and I still find it hard to speak to him as he sits behind that glass and talks to me through a phone.

But he deserves to see his daughter. After everything...she deserves to know who her father is. I'm not going to take that away from her because I know how it feels to grow up without a parent.

I was forced to grow up and I wouldn't want that for my daughter.

So as I sit here writing about my "epic love" I look up at my daughter and smile knowing that I'm going to give you so much more than I had.

She will know what it feels like to be loved and she will never have to question whether or not she matters because she does.

She's my everything and even though I can't stand Hakeem...I know he will give her everything in the world. When I can't be there, he will be there. We will love our baby girl more than she will ever understand and she will never have to experience any of the pain I experienced.....I will make sure of it...

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Sorry for any mistakes!🌸

Thoughts?