𝐒𝐀𝐃 𝐁𝐄𝐀𝐔𝐓𝐈𝐅𝐔𝐋 𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐆𝐈𝐂; S.S.

24 • feeling again

Alcohol doesn't have as big as an effect on me than I'd like it to. Another reason to dislike being a vampire.

A man tried flirting with me. I snapped his neck. This made everyone vanish. Except for the bartender. He's still under my compulsion. It didn't take long for Stefan to find me.

"Don't you have anything better to do?" I ask him, throwing another shot down my throat.

He walks over to the cd player, turning up the music. I recognize the song.

I'll Be by Edwin McCain.

"I have this aching feeling that you're going to make me dance with you." I sigh. Of course, I'm right. He takes my hand and pulls me to the middle of the room.

His one hand slides around my waist, while the other interlocks with mine. I reluctantly place my hand on his shoulder. He leads, swaying us back and forth.

"Remember when we danced in 1864?" Stefan asks.

I roll my eyes. "I'm not feeling all that sentimental."

"You wanted to dance with me before that. The night of the founder's ball. Katherine had taken me so you were stuck with my brother. I did want to dance with you. But, after that night, I found myself kissing Katherine."

I meet his gaze. "You think I care about you kissing my sister over a hundred years ago? Move on, Stefan. I have."

"I think you're lying." He says. "I think you're so pissed at her for doing that. I think you don't even imagine her as your sister anymore."

"She's not the one I'm pissed at." I can feel myself slipping.

He tilts his head. "Who are you pissed at?"

"It doesn't matter." I try to brush off the conversation. My finger impatiently taps on his shoulder. I want to rip his head off.

"It does matter. Is it me? Are you pissed at me?"

I breathe deeply. "No."

"Come on, Hadiya. Tell me. Who's got you so rattled that it forced you to turn it off? Who messed up your life so horribly that you hate every cell in their body?"

My eyes move from his. It suddenly got so hot in this room. I can feel my eyes begin to water. Tears? Seriously?

"It's Klaus, alright! I'm so fucking pissed at him. How he turned me, how he killed my family, how even after everything he did there's still a part of me that feels something for him. Are you happy?"

We stop dancing. "Yes. That right there, that anger you feel. Let it in. He did you so wrong and you deserve to be pissed at him."

I push his shoulders. Once, twice, three times.

"God I want to fucking kill him." My emotions bombard me. I can feel my fingers tingling. This raw power sends Stefan flying into the wall.

I grip my head. "No, no, no, no. I don't want to feel. Stop!"

It's not up to me anymore. Everything comes flooding back. I sink to my knees, cradling my head.

Sadness, happiness, enjoyment, relief. I can feel everything. But most of all, anger. I feel so much hate radiating through my body. I hate Klaus Mikaelson with every fiber of my being.

Stefan regains himself, pressing a hand to my shoulder. I look up at him with a tear stained face.

"I'm gonna kill him."

emotions are backkkkk

~c