Hard As It Is

Chapter 15

What about all them times we fucked bitches together? Was he turned on by them or me? More importantly, why wasn't I frightened by that thought?

"Say man when we tag team them hoes together-

"Shaq," he whines out his face redder than before.   I scrunch up my face at him as I say, "Stop cutting me off and answer the questions." 

"But you tryna embarrass me and I-

"I could care less you owe me explanations, especially since you admitted that I was the first nigga to pull your ass into the rainbow," I tell him as his breath hitches and he lets out a laugh.

"Shut up nigga you corny!"

I watch the dimples in his cheeks deepen as his smile grows wider with laughter. I couldn't help but let that tug on my own.

"What about Quita? You can't lead that girl on forever, and you definitely can't be sleeping around with niggas, then going back to her that's not right and you know that," I explain to him and he lets out a shaky breath.

"I know it's selfish, but I'm scared of people's judgment alright, being called out of my name every day, always having to defend my manhood cause I rather dick over pussy. I don't wanna be considered less of a man, that judgment I'm not ready for it." He tells me and I could tell by his voice he feels guilty, but at the same time scared.

"You can't keep running from your truth forever Quez, take Lorenzo and Sunny, you think they had it easy they were probably treated worse back then than how gay people are treated in present times. However it didn't stop them from being together, getting married, and living in their truth," I tell him turning the key, and starting up the car.

I drive past many houses until I reach the red light.  "What about August and Maverick those two couldn't live happily together?" I hear Quez question me softly his voice was small.

"Yet some part of them were happy to die for one another. A love story is not always going to have a happy and sunny ending. If that's how the love worked it wouldn't be no such thing as heartbreak or sadness,"  I tell him as his eyes narrow for more of my response.

"What I'm saying is you can't judge how your experience or what you're going to experience based on other people's lives because everyone's story is different."

I stop my car at the red light. "Shaquille?" I hear Quez say my name as I turn my head in his direction. I don't know how it happened shit was so fast, but I do know his lips were softer than I expected.

I place my hand on his face as I slip my tongue into his mouth hearing him moan, sending vibrations through my throat. Our tongues battle for dominance and I overpower him easily. We make out until the need to breathe consumes us and a car honks from behind us.  He licks my bottom lip leaving a trail of saliva as he shrinks in his seat from embarrassment.

I drive off one hand on the steering wheel as I touch my bottom wet lip. "I'm sorry," Quez apologizes to me as I shake my head trying to calm my nerves.

"Nah you don't have to apologize you're good," I say to him pulling into my driveway. I watch Quez unbuckle his seatbelt, my eyes traveling toward his lips which were a tad swollen.

My phone rings as I get out of the car, and I look at it to see it's Jahmir. "Hello?" I answer finally calming my nerves. Quez got out of the car as I pressed the speaker button. "Tyasha took Soul her and some two other niggas. Slicks dead also been dead or quite some time," he lets us know as Quez smacks his lips.