In Time Gone By...

~ 12 ~

The training room walls echoed with the sound of punches against a bag in the corner, Bailee's jacket strewn along the floor beside it as she furiously beat out her pain. 

Her fury had led her here, stalking past unsuspecting officers and half kicking the door open, something raw and primal coursing through her veins. Everything around her was a target, an outlet for her anger, and could be struck at any moment. 

Nothing mattered now but imagining Elliott as the recipient of her attacks. The way her hair was half wild now, escaping its place, top buttons undone and shirt hanging free, it was no position to be seen in. Not by anyone. But what did that matter? 

"Dare I ask?" Grace's voice broke through the barrage, the most timid her friend had ever heard it. Bailee stopped, running her hand across her face but not looking over, catching her breath for a moment. 

"It's hardly worth talking about." was the reply, deep and hoarse and not like herself. 

"I see... The general was looking for you, he seemed worried." 

Bailee inspected her hands where she stood, shaking gently at the sight of them, a sheen of sweat and blood confirming all of the emotions raging within her. She swallowed. "He's the last person I ought to see...I've embarrassed myself."

"I know you saw the prisoner, B. I know it's him." 

A tightness began to form in her throat as the anger started to seep away and her blood turn cold with pain. "I don't want to talk about him." 

"I understand." Grace came closer, arms folded in slight caution. "But I am here...in case you need me. You might not." 

"I always need you." Bailee turned to her, lip starting to tremble, voice catching and getting lost in her throat. 

She nearly collapsed into her arms, wrapping hers around her neck and burying her face in her shoulder; her uniform gradually became wetter and wetter with tears. "I don't know what to do, Gigi." 

"Hey...it's alright...Just let it out." Grace murmured, gentle and calm as she had her sit down by the wall and curl into her. 

The punching bag continued to sway gently from its inflictions, stained with fresh streaks of blood and creaking a little. Bailee's hands were dull with pain now, starting to throb as everything else, all of the words and heartache seeped into her friend's uniform where they sat. 

And even though Grace sat there with her in her arms, there was still that lingering little worm in her head, born from the harsh words of the prisoner: 'have you ever considered the fact that no one ever liked you?' 

How could anyone ever start to sift through the depths of what was true now and what had all been a lie. Nothing but falseness and loathing and distrust. What had any of it ever meant? 

Eventually, her breathing slowed, tears drying out and leaving that nauseating dull ache in her head. She sat back a bit from Grace's shoulder who brushed away the mahogany strands that stuck to her cheeks. 

"I'm sorry..." Bailee whispered, pressing her hands to her head and taking some breaths. 

"Never say sorry... Now, you don't have to tell me what's gone on, all that's been said," She wiped some escaped tears from her cheeks. "But I'm here if you ever want to." 

Bailee nodded, the smallest flicker of a smile passing her lips in recognition. "Thank you." 

"Now, shall we get you cleaned up? Come on." 

***

Bailee tried not to let the whole thing with Elliott get to her, but it was hard to forget those words. Coming from anyone it hurts to be told those things, but from him, from someone who was supposed to protect and love her at some point, it soaked into her skin. Everyone she had ever known in fact felt the same. She had tried so hard in her life to build a strong barrier, thick skin, especially now she was in the Order which could be brutal at times. But in that one meeting between them, everything seemed to have crumbled. Being so vulnerable felt so wrong.