Dopamine Rush

23 - TO DREAM AGAIN.

"Aalis ka?" was the first words that comes out from his mouth.

Unti-unti kong ibinaling sa kanya ang paningin. I felt chills down my spine when I saw the look in his face. He felt betrayed. Nawala lahat ng tuwa na nararamdaman ko nang makita ko ang sakit sa mukha niya.

"Carlo.." I tried explaining but I can't organize my thoughts. Words won't come out my mouth. I feel like I lost my voice.

"Iz naman. Iiwan mo 'ko?" Nanlulumo nitong sabi.

"No." Tila nanlulumo ko ring sagot. "Tutuparin ko lang ang mga pangarap ko, Carlo."

Hindi niya nagustuhan ang mga nalaman niya. It clearly shows. He didn't manage to hid his honest reaction and all the emotions that comes after knowing my plan.

"I don't want to talk to you, Iz." He said, getting his car keys on the table.

"Carlo.." Pigil ko sa braso niya.

Walang gana niyang tinanggal ang kamay ko at muling nagsalita. "Don't follow me. I can't even stand looking at you right now."

I was astound. Before I can even react, his car was roaring away from me. Maging ang makina ng kanyang sasakyan ay nagsusumigaw ng matinding pagtutol.

Carlo ignored me for days and I understand it. Hinayaan ko siya. But Carlo, ignoring me for more than a week now is a different story.

Iz: Are you going to fetch me or should I just take a taxi?

Carlo: I'm busy. If you want, you can stay in your apartment instead. I'll be home late.

Iz: Let's have a dinner together. Please come home as early as you can. I'll be waiting.

After sending the message, pumara na ako ng taxi papunta sa bahay niya. Pagdating ay agad kong inihanda ang mga pagkaing binili ko sa paborito naming restaurant. Exactly 8 PM ay narinig ko na ang kotse niya sa labas, kaya naman ay ininit ko na ang mga pagkain.

"You're home." Bungad ko. Hindi ko alam kung dapat ba akong yumakap o humalik sa pisngi niya kaya ngumiti na lang ako. "Kumain na tayo."

"I'm not hungry. I want to rest." He replied. Nagsimula na itong umakyat sa hagdan.

"Hanggang kailan mo 'ko planong hindi pansinin, Carlo? I told you I wanted to eat with you. If you'll just ignore me, edi sana hindi ka na umuwi. Sana pinaghintay mo na lang ako. Mas kaya ko pa 'yon." Malamig kong saad.

"I gave you a choice to stay in your apartment instead." He replied.

"You ignored me for two weeks, you think I'll do nothing about it? You expect me to be okay with it? Excuse me, I'm your girlfriend." Sagot ko rin. Inis itong himarap sa akin.

"You're leaving, and you expect me to be fine with it and be happy and celebrate for it?" Sarkastiko nitong tanong. "Sa tingin mo kaya kong kumain kasama ka na para bang walang nangyari? Na parang bang hindi mo ako iiwan? Dinner together? That was so insensitive of you, Iz!"

Bigla akong natigilan at napapagod na napa-buntong hininga.

"I supported you all the way, can't you do the same for me?" Malumanay at nalulungkot kong tanong.

"Bakit ngayon pa? Alam mo naman na kailangang-kailangan kita." He replied.

"Kailangan ko din to, Carlo." Determinado kong saad.