The Holiday Trade

03. timtams and blue dress

Sitting up with my mouth agape, it's been thirty minutes since I ended the call with Noah, thirty minutes since I received the news.

Noah. Peng. Is dating. 

My focus was fixed on my green mug of warm tea that Lilly brought in, who was also out in the kitchen fetching every sweet snack she could find, left in my room. The lights were on and I could see Lilli rummaging through our cabinets, muttering under her breath.

My mind was spiralling, thoughts going everywhere, trying to uncover clues or distant memories of Noah and this mysterious River. Trying to wrap my head around the conversation, I let myself dwell on it once more. 

"You're... what?"

"I've been dating this girl, River, for a little over six months. She's awesome Haze."

"What...?"

"I've been dating-"

"NO, yes I know that part. I'm just shocked, that's all."

"Right, why are you shocked?"

"Oh no! I don't mean it like that! I just did not see that coming."

"Yeah, neither to be honest."

"So how did you guys meet?"

"We met at a party a year ago, and we've been pretty inseparable since then."

"That's... cute."

"Yeah, and I thought it would be good for her to join us at the wedding, as my plus-one?"

"Oh! That sounds, interesting. Have you told Aunty Carol yet?"

"No, that's also why I wanted to speak to you. I was wondering if we could show up together, you, me and River?"

"Noah-"

"No, I know!  I know it's weird, trust me, but I just thought since my mum loves you so much, having you with us could make the situation less awkward. Or it could be even better, seeing  you and me, her son, together at the same time."

"Look, I want to help you out but I'm just not sure if it's a good idea."

"Why wouldn't it be a good idea?"

"You know why, Noah."

A sigh escaped my lips as I leaned my head back on my bed frame, trying very hard to keep my beating heart under control yet failing. I couldn't believe what I'd just heard, Noah Peng, my Noah from childhood was in love with someone, and it was not me. 

I'd always knew this day would come though, that one day, Noah would meet someone special, fall in love and marry them. I just thought the person would be me. This was stupid, our history was long gone. 

"I couldn't find the last pack of caramel popcorn we have so I got the emergency TimTams," Lilly said, trying to keep the sadness out of her voice and placing the classic chocolate delights I bought yesterday into my lap. 

With a slight smile, I thanked her kind gesture and proceeded to rip open the packaging, taking a slice out and shoving it into my mouth, hoping the sugar would numb the tiny dagger wounds in my chest. 

Lilly reached over to the side of my bed and turned on my speaker for her to play music. She'd always said that music makes people feel better if they don't listen to those sad songs from YouTube edits, and that's what she did. 'That's What I Like' by Bruno Mars started filling up the emptiness of my bedroom, I rolled my eyes at Lilly who laughed at my reaction. She's pretty annoying, but that's why I love her.