Incorrect quotes but with BFDI

Death p.a.c.t again part 2

I'm doing this again because I love this team too much :D

*Casually in the Middle of a High Stakes/Dangerous Situation*
Remote: How do you eat pickles?
Marker: What do you mean?
Remote: I mean, there's a whole process. It's not like you can grab them from the jar with your hand, because it's cold and the juice burns if you have a cut, plus, it's pretty unsanitary. And you can't use a spoon because you'll have to scoop it out, and it'll be way too difficult to grab more than three or four without taking 10 minutes along with half the brine in the jar, even if it's one with holes.
Marker: Yeah, that's why you use a fork.
Remote: Okay, sure, but what if you don't have one of the big ones clean? It's weird to use a small one. But there is always  one of those smaller sharp knives clean.
Marker: But the straight edge doesn't really fit the cylindrical shape, and you have to make sure you don' t break it, it's too much work.
Remote: It makes me feel like I deserve the pickles though. Like, "Yeah, I did it. That's right. Good job me." It's empowering. But even after that, it's not like you can use a bowl.
Marker: I get that, it's not ascetically pleasing.
Remote: Exactly! And it looks weird if you don't entirely fill the bowl, but you also can't eat that many. My solution: Use a mug.
Marker: *Nods in agreement*
Tree: That is all very interesting, BUT WE'RE TRYING NOT TO DIE RIGHT NOW! USE YOUR LIMITED ATTENTION SPANS AND FOCUS!
Remote: Jeez, okay.
Marker: Quit yelling at us already.

Lightning: *mixing different alcoholic beverages together*
Fanny: What are you making?
Lightning: A mistake.

Fanny: Everyone knows that Santa is an invention designed by the big five corporations to sell tinsel and video games to an unsuspecting public.
Tree: The whole "childhood wonder" stage just blew right past you, didn't it?

Black Hole: I don't need to go to bed. I'm not tired, I'll be fine.
Tree: But, darling, I'll be so lonely without you. Come curl up in my arms so I can feel whole again.
Black Hole: O-oh. Well. Are you trying to seduce me into healthy sleeping patterns??
Tree: Is it working?

Tree: Can you cut me some slack, Black Hole? I'm sort of in love.
Black Hole: I'm sorry, but that's really not my problem.
Tree: I'm in love with you.
Black Hole: *blushes* Oh. That brings me in the loop a little.

Black Hole: I didn't drink that much last night.
Lightning: You were flirting with Tree.
Black Hole: So what? He's my partner.
Lightning: You asked if he was single.
Lightning: And then you cried when he said he wasn't.

Fanny: Everything will be ok. You can not stop it.
Fanny: Everything will be fine. You have no choice.
Pie: What the fuck kind of pep talk is that?
Fanny: Ominous positivity.

Black Hole walking into the kitchen and seeing all their limes peeled: Tree, I love you but, what the h-e-double FUCK.
Tree, sipping coffee happily: I love you too :)

Pie: Ah, yes. Here we have a beautiful couple...
Tree: I really care about your feelings!
Black Hole: I really care about YOUR feelings!
Pie, turning their head: ...and then there's the disaster couple...
Remote: YOU NEED TO PAY MORE ATTENTION TO ME INSTEAD OF BEING AT THE HOSPITAL!
Fanny: I WOULDN'T HAVE TO SPEND SO MUCH TIME AT THE HOSPITAL IF YOU STOPPED INSISTING ON FIGHTING EVERYONE WHO COMES WITHIN A FIVE FOOT RADIUS OF YOU!

Black Hole: That's ridiculous, Tree doesn't have a crush on me.
Pie: Yes he does.
Remote: Yes he does.
Tree: Yes I do.